Saturday, August 4, 2007

My Freaky "Friend"

So...let's talk about sex. "Oh no! You sound just like my husband," some of you are saying. "I don't want to talk about sex. It's Saturday, shouldn't we be talking about shopping?"

And I get that. I totally do (and we will talk about shopping, that is the good news). Sometimes after having a baby, or dealing with the kids, or working all day long, or just having one too many days of having to get up and go through the motions of bathing/eating/breathing/etc. you're just not feeling it. At all. AT ALL. But your husband is still wanting to feel it. All of it. ALL OF IT. And therein lies the dilemma.

I know some of you lay there pretending to be asleep until he gives up or blurt out, "I feel kind of pukey" as soon as you realize he has that twinkle in his eye. But eventually, it must be done. And usually, once it is done you think, "That wasn't so bad, we should do that more often." but sometimes it is just too hard to get past that "I can't because it would involve expending energy and I just washed these damn sheets" mindset.

And that is where our new friend Viva Cream comes in (available at adult toy shopping, I am being specific so you can't blame me for being fired for shopping for adult products) Well, "my friend's" new friend. Because I don't do any kind of icky, embarrassing stuff and because a lady never tells. I, uh, my friend has used similar products before and they were okay, but this is the best, from what she says. My friend is actually out of this right now and that is what inspired this post, my sympathy for her. You can use it with his assistance or you can pop in the bathroom with it when you realize it may be that kind of night and need to start thinking happy thoughts. Seriously, your husband gives you permission to buy this (not that you need his damn permission).

Also, Too Timid has 4 freebies to choose from right now, you just pay shipping and handling (usually around $7). Or so my friend says. That pervert.

Good luck ladies. Vaya con Viva Cream!


Ms. Skywalker said...

Having just awoken from a sexual coma, and in fear of retreating back into it, I thank you for the continual toy selection.

The triangular selection on my dresser is a great conversation starter. :)

Deb said...

My own friend just ordered some, because she has tried many kinds of these creams and finds them all terrible, but holds out hope that the miracle cream may someday come along. This one could be it.

Cake said...

I've been drinking, which makes me comment-y...

I just ordered that, for my friend. She hasn't been that into it lately and hopes she will thank you in about 8-10 business days.


tommie said...

This will come in handy in about 150 days when hubby gets home.....I will put it on my Christmas list! uuhh, I mean my friend will put it on her list.

Mackenzie said...

After fighting for two hours last night about why I didn't want to have sex, which was just being fucking exhausted, I ordered some just now. Thanks for the tip!