Neutered

We tried to get our dog Murphy neutered as a puppy, but were told that his testicles hadn't descended and the surgery was going to cost significantly more than we had thought. The vet advised us to wait 6 months and hope they dropped.

They didn't.

Now the little bastard is trying to mark everything as his territory, and has left me no other option than to get his invisible nuts removed.

I need to make some phone calls to get price quotes, but you know how I don't really like the phone? Turns out I REALLY don't like the phone if I know the first sentence is going to involve the phrase "undescended testicles". If I have to say that to a stranger over the phone, I will laugh. It will be nervous laughter, but I'll sound like an immature freak (and I can be an immature freak, but I don't want strangers on the phone to be able to tell). Now that I've convinced myself that this is going to happen and I've made a big deal of it, I really can't make the calls because I definitely will laugh.

I want Mr. Ashley to do it, but I guess he doesn't have the time or desire to be discussing undescended testicles at the workplace and as a result, it's just not getting done. I'm thinking about calling the Humane Society vet and declaring them the lowest bidder just so I can get this taken care of in one call.

Or maybe Mr. Ashley could call them on his lunch hour? He has testicles, he should be fine talking about them.