Friday, October 2, 2015

Family Ties

little kid and I like to talk about the names of his future children.

Rose, Summer and Maria are at the top his girl list right now.


Jack and Dominick are his boy names.

So freaking cute.

"You could name your daughter Aquifer," I joked one day after we were discussing wells. (Yes, like wells for water. We talk about weird things.) "Aquifer McCann."

"Maybe I'll change my last name." He said.

"Change it?!"

"Well, maybe I'll take my wife's last name. I don't know."

"Wow. That's awfully progressive of you! Very forward thinking. That's pretty cool."

"You never know, mom, maybe she'll have a cool last name. Besides, I've decided you should probably do whatever your wife wants. If she wants us to use her last name, we will."

Dear future daughter-in-law, I'm writing this for you. I don't care what you call yourselves but you're going to be a lucky lady.

You and little Aquifer both.

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

True Wealth

little kid is really into reading this year.

His teacher offers full-size candy bars to kids who reach a certain reading goal, and that just sparked the love of literature into a full-on inferno.

"Mom, if you could have a Lamborghini or 9 really nice bookcases full of your favorite books, which would you pick?"

"The Lamborghini," I said without pause.


"What? I have a Kindle and a library card. No one's lending me a Lamborghini."

"You know what I would pick, mom?"


"I'd pick the books. Because I could read them all and get the knowledge and get into a good college and get a good job and get my own Lamborghini AND still have the books."

"That is an amazing answer! I'm really proud of you! I am so impressed by your motivation this year!"

"Now what would you pick?"

"Still the Lambo."


This kid's going places.

Maybe I'll even drive him there in my Lamborghini.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

The Search for Happiness

Sunday was my 37th birthday.

I spent the entire day in bed with unbrushed hair and no pants, feeling fuzzy and warm inside from an abundance of both Facebook birthday wishes and Nyquil, alternating between shivering, arguing with Mr. Ashley that I had broken a rib coughing, and watching Netflix for about 8 hours straight.

Pretty much the perfect day.

Although it was my 7th day of flu-monia-bola (self-diagnosed) it was one of the first where I got to be the only sick person in the house. As a mom, being sick without having to take care of other sick people is as rare as the super blood moon lunar eclipse that happened that night. People did stuff for me and cleaned up after me and brought me things. It was like my birthday. And it was my birthday! The stars aligned.

I watched Hector and the Search for Happiness, a title I almost scrolled past until remembering a book review with a similar title that was on my "to read" list. Since my reading list isn't getting any shorter I thought it might be nice to cross this one off with a movie instead -- and I can't tell you how glad I am that I saw this, and that I saw it when I did. It was exactly what I needed. It's a quietly sweet and moving story, just quirky enough to be captivating without becoming a distraction. It was lovely.

"Avoiding unhappiness is not the road to happiness." 

It was just what I needed. I liked that line so much that I texted it to myself so I wouldn't forget it. There were a million striking little moments like that; I felt like I should be taking notes. 

And now I've got to read the book right away. Life has been so busy that I feel like I don't have one spare moment in the world to do so, but I must. 

Sometimes it seems like the universe is telling me that the key to happiness is to go eat/pray/love my way around the world while hiding from everyone and everything who annoys me but I will admit that maybe I have to listen a little harder to the universe on that one. I might have misheard. 

The universe might have said that, though. And I might have broken a rib.

Sometimes the universe also urges me to take more cough medicine, too, though, so maybe it's a bad influence. 

Later the boys snuggled me and we watched Mickey and the Beanstalk and no one wrestled or argued. Even my cat was nice to me and he's a sassy little jerk. The stars aligned indeed. 

It really was a great day.

So stay tuned for my upcoming mid-life crisis -- I'm trying to narrow it down between running away or staying in bed. Money is unfortunately a factor in both decisions so let's hope the universe gets shit figured out soon.

(I am a member of the Netflix Stream Team but was not compensated for this post or asked to watch this movie. We're just friends, okay? I mean, if they wanted to be more than friends, I would be open to that, especially in light of this mid-life crisis thing but for now this post is uninfluenced by our relationship. I'm not above selling out, I just haven't yet.) 

Friday, September 25, 2015

Mom/Boy Band

Much to my delight, little kid has joined ukulele club. I don't know if I'm more delighted that there is such a thing or that he wanted to do it, but I am delighted.

"How was the first day?" I asked when he got home.

"It was so great. I love it. I can already play some notes and I learned the Put the Lime in the Coconut song!"

"That is so exciting!! I will buy you your own ukulele so you don't have to use theirs. Maybe I should buy myself one too! We could be a mom/boy band!"

He was looking at me and smiling, trying to be polite while determining if I was joking or not.

(I really do want my own ukulele and it only makes sense that we would perform together...)

"I could dance too! Look, something like this," I mimed my ukulele playing dance as he watched patiently. "What do you think?" I asked, doing my best to look hopeful and excited as he looked concerned.

"Let's hold off on the dancing right now."

"So we're a yes? I agree we need to polish up the choreography before we go live."

"Yeah...well, let's first get me a ukulele and see how that goes and maybe you can get one for Christmas or something."

So it looks like we'll be ready to tour 2016.

Monday, September 14, 2015

Mr. Right

The kids have been talking about 9/11 a lot since the anniversary recently passed.

"It was a scary day. When the first plane hit, it seemed like an accident but then the other tower got hit, and the Pentagon, and the plane crash."

"And the Octagon." little kid finished.

"No, Pentagon. Not Octagon."

"That's right. The Octagon was saved."

"No, there's no Octagon. You're thinking of the Pentagon. It's shaped like a pentagon."

"There is an Octagon though."

I started to protest and he continued, "Somewhere in the world, there is a building shaped like an octagon. For sure. And it was safe on September 11th."

I'm sure he's right.

He's always right.

Monday, August 31, 2015

Netflix Emergency Preparedness Plan

We were supposed to have a tropical storm this weekend, but Erika was weak and disorganized and fell apart -- a plan of action that mirrors many of my own. We honest to God had more rain during our vacation at the beach house, without the excitement of a named storm.

I was really well-prepared for a weather event so I honored that and worked from home, secure in my bedroom fortress, wearing pajamas and well stocked with snacks and supplies. There wasn't really a storm though, just a steady gray drizzle, but I consider this a successful dry run.

Since the family wasn't able to attend the weather event dress rehearsal, I went ahead and binge watched Don't Trust the B in Apt 23 once I wrapped up work. Now I will feel obligated to laugh at all of the jokes like it's the first time I've heard them since the show used to be something Mr. Ashley and I enjoyed together each night, one episode at a time. It was worth it, though. I never watched while it was on the air because the title is awful and I don't like girl friend shows, but I am glad I happened upon it because it is hilarious. I don't know the last time I've laughed out loud so often, I'm going to be sad to get to the end. Maybe I shouldn't have watched ahead.

I also watched Secret of the Kells over the rainy weekend, which was on Netflix a long time ago and then disappeared for a while. little kid and I loved it then and we love it now, it is so beautifully animated and unique.

Another new favorite is Freakshow, even though it seems a little contrived and occasionally offensive. It's a reality show featuring the family that runs the Venice Beach Freak Show and they seem nice enough but they have a two headed baby in a jar and that's sad.

So, there's a peek at my weather event preparedness plan. Please take not-quite-a-tropical-storms seriously and prepare your queue accordingly.

Please note: I'm a member of the Netflix Stream Team but that doesn't affect my opinions, just my productivity.