Social Awkwardness

Big Kid really needs some friends. He's lonely and bored and kind of crabby.

However, I want no part of awkward play dates at neutral, annoying, kid-filled places with moms I wouldn't otherwise choose to hang out with. I want friends dropped off at the house and then I want the kids to go to the playroom and do their own thing.

I don't know how to make that transition though. I think his classmates' moms know me well enough but I still feel a little weird calling and asking them to drop off their kids. His favorite male friend is the one with the socially awkward mom and she mentioned that she doesn't allow birthday candles due to the potential danger, so would she (and should she?) drop her kid off at my house?

Do I want her kid at my house?

We joined an organic co-op and when I went to sign up, my boys had a great time with the co-op owner's 6 and 7 year old sons and then we discovered that they live one street down from us. I can see her house from my front yard. The co-op is on break for summer but I do have her email address (and she lives within sight). Do I just ask if her boys can come over to play or will we most likely have to hang out first, or what? I keep hoping I'll see her outside with the kids but I never do. She is a juicing guru and my dad did just give us a juicer, so I could always use that pretext for getting back in touch. God, I'm such a dork. Who knew becoming a mom could create such social awkwardness? I thought kids just got together and played, I didn't think I'd have to do so much facilitating to make it happen.

I let Big Kid call Ahsiya this evening because he's been asking for days. He just misses her like crazy. The other day out of nowhere he told me, "You know what? I've been finkin' and I loved Ahsiya since da first day of school. Da very first day." After days of begging to call her, and after making her mom understand who he was and who he wanted, he sat there silently once she got on the line. He covered the receiver and hissed, "I don't know what to say!" at me and I whispered to ask about her summer. Awkward pauses and "What?" "What?" "What?" followed for a minute or so. I told him to tell her that he missed playing with her, and he did--loudly and with a smile. Then her mom got on and said that Ahsiya would call him right back, that she needed the phone really quick and then she would call him back at this number and was that okay? He said it was and hung up.

He was happy and went back to watching television and doing his own thing. He even thanked me and gave me a hug for letting him call her. I noticed that she didn't call back, but figured he forgot and was happy with the conversation they had. Right before bed he said, "But Ahsiya's sposed to call me right back. I been waitin' all dis time. I need to talk to her so bad." Ugh.

Did she forget? Feel too shy to call? Not want to call? Why oh why didn't she call?!?

The whole thing is just painful to watch.

I hope it gets easier as they get older.