Free Fall

Last week I walked into my bathroom to find a naked little kid standing on my toilet, one foot on either side of the seat, pooping and going through the make-up on the counter at the same time.

"What are you doing?!" I yelled.

"Cleanin' up," he answered.

I angrily explained why long distance pooping was a terrible idea and told him to never ever do it again.

"I do it all a time and nuttin' ever goes bad," he insisted.

"Don't!!!!"

Lo and behold, there was evidence of long distance pooping gone wrong in their bathroom this morning. I was beyond furious and between his habit of nervous laughter and the poop smeared all over the bathroom (he had attempted clean up), I'd say it's a miracle everyone made it out of this situation alive and unharmed.

What is he thinking when he does these things??

Do I even want to know?

Who's in Charge Around Here?

You know what sucks? Other than people that aren't voting for me daily in the Bloggies?

The fact that there has been dishes in the sink for two days and it doesn't look like they're going anywhere.

I thought for sure if they sat there long enough, they would figure out a way to clean themselves up and get back in the cabinets, but apparently no can do.

Same goes for the laundry on the couch...is it going to sit there all week? Frankly, I'm getting tired of looking at it. Also, it hinders any further laundry progress because I don't want to add to the pile.

I have a hair appointment today. You know how I love my hair dresser and our book discussions. The Gay One is bringing me some historical fiction I've been looking forward to reading, so I'm eager to get my hands on it. I also love sitting and drinking wine and having pretty hair. Maybe shit will straighten up around here in my absence....