The Library Wins

Wouldn't you know it, I got a letter from the library.

Yes, I have some things overdue and a smallish fine, but those violations don't usually get a letter.

The letter said that The Giving Tree had pen marks and a stain on it and I owe them $16.

FUCKERS.

I *know* the pen was there when we got it, it was black ink and I remember thinking some kid must've been inspired by the pen and ink illustrations and it slipped by the Library Nazi because it blended in so well.

But NOW they see it, and who are they going to believe:

Carmen the Library Nazi?

or

Ashley who has allegedly damaged 4 other books (I'll admit to two) and constantly carries an overdue balance?

Fuckers.

And I'm curious about this stain. I read the book twice, little kid was never near it, I kept it on the shelf by the front door. I just can't imagine it's anything to write a letter about.

I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY CARMEN.

You'll never have to look up my card number or handle my dirty money ever again.

Bitch.