The Reluctant Scout

It finally happened the other day.

I knew it would. I thought that possibly I could evade it or ignore it and last year I did, but it happened again.

little kid wants to join Boy Scouts.

And I get it, I really do. But boy, oh boy, do I strongly dislike the organization. I know it's getting better, I know the individual troops are most likely fine, I know they don't have enough sway to negatively influence my child but let me tell you exactly how much I don't want to fund raise or contribute to the organization as a whole. There's a lot about the adult side of things there that I really disagree with. I will do you a favor and not list all of them.

They gave him a flyer at school and he came home and asked about it and I set it aside and said we'd consider it, not really considering it. Then the Monday of the meeting, he asked again.

"How about karate?" I tried.

"I want to do Boy Scouts."

I sighed. "Look, I want you to do Boy Scouts too. It's just something your dad and I have to talk about, there are some issues with their leadership--not anything that would affect you directly, just grown up political stuff, that we really don't like. We also need to make sure we can commit the time and money to a new activity."

"What kind of politics stuff?"

"Up until recently, they didn't allow gay members and in the past have even gone so far as to kick boys who admitted feeling that way out of the group. That doesn't really line up with their duty to be kind, some kids who have gotten all the way to the very top ranking have even quit over it. I think most Scouts themselves are good people who do nice things but it's not very nice of the organization as a whole. There are still some other ongoing issues, too. It makes it hard to give them our time and money."

"What's their problem with gay people?"

"I don't really know. I guess because the Bible says something about it."

"I thought the Bible wanted us to be nice to each other, I thought that was the whole point."

"Me too. I guess there are some old rules in there though and people still like some of those."

"I don't think God or Jesus would like it." He thought for a minute, "Well...I will still be nice to gay people. I like them and think they can love who they want. But I want to be a Boy Scout."

Of course he will still be nice to gay people. Of course he wants to be a Boy Scout.

I was sick yesterday for the orientation (and to be honest, I was still leaning so far on the side of no that my headache was barely a factor. The fact that the activities aren't something I'm personally interested in at all doesn't make it more tempting, and Mr. Ashley works a lot.) I thought I missed a bullet. I folded up the flyer and stuck it in a magazine. Out of sight, out of mind.

Until he came home from school and asked if the meeting had passed. I reminded him that his brother and I were sick yesterday and he looked sad.

"I wanted to be a Boy Scout."

"How about any other activity? In the whole wide world? Karate, guitar, rock climbing, painting, sailing, I'll buy you a kayak--what?"

"I just wanted to be a Boy Scout, and now it's too late." He wasn't pouting. He was sad.

I sighed. "It's not too late. You can still be a Boy Scout." I wasn't pouting. I was sad. Sad that the grown-ups can't just practice what they preach and play nicely with others and that this is still an issue at all.

"There goes your dignity," added Big Kid, who I hadn't realized was listening.

"Me?" I asked.

"He's going to look ridiculous in that outfit and they don't like gay people."

"The outfit isn't bad. They're coming around on the gay thing, maybe. I think it will be okay," I said.

He raised his eyebrows and made a skeptical face. I would have made the same face at myself.

Other People's Property

I had an all day migraine and Big Kid stayed home sick from school (talking) all day, so I can't do any more thinking. So I will give you other people's thoughts instead--

Poignant comic
Jewel encrusted saint skeletons
Cold war bomb shelter time capsule
Tiny hats on a 3-legged cat
Some guy's vacation across Africa
Homeless kid Miami mythology
Funny bench in London
Dr. Seuss was scared of kids
Sad chimp attack story with a twist

WhyTime

So, guess what my newest writing gig is? You're never going to guess.

MOTIVATIONAL QUOTES FOR A TIME MANAGEMENT APP.

No, seriously. For real. Quit laughing.

When I was originally approached about it, I was intrigued but concerned.

"Have you actually read my blog?" I asked before committing. "I'm not exactly...motivational. Or managing my time well." (Which was probably already indicated to them by my slow response time.)

I'm not my own best endorsement, in case you hadn't picked up on that.

They knew. They didn't care. They liked me anyway. They said they knew what they were getting into and that I was allowed to be funny. The other contributors are all super duper inspirational and on top of their game so I guess they had room to risk it.

And that's how I became a contributor for the new Whytime App! They featured information from an interview with me on their website and I think it's the fanciest thing that is about me on the whole wide internet--you can see it here.

(I took that photograph using my camera's self-timer in my backyard. If you ever need an exercise in humility, there's your assignment. I think this is the second time ever I've shared a picture of myself here.)

But enough about me. Even more delightful than all of the flattery, the app and I are a perfect match. Well, the app and the Woman I Want to Be are, and her and I have a date to meet back up one of these days here soon. Anyone who has been reading for a while knows that I love a new life plan but I have commitment issues. My favorite part of a new plan is making the lists and checking the boxes but then I get overwhelmed with all of that stuff to do and feel defeated, which leads to me doing even less. It's exhausting to be this unproductive.

 The best thing about the Whytime App is that it focuses on making time for yourself a priority--so you get all of the joy of an accomplished to do list along with the pleasure of scheduling a promise to take care of yourself and actually following through with it. The way I look at it, at least I would get the "me" stuff done and then every to do list would seem slightly more complete, and maybe I'll be more eager to actually consult my to-do list if there are things I want to do on it.

The whole app is very streamlined, smart, simple and satisfying. You can find it here on itunes.

We're also going to give one away, so enter below! You can enter 3 different ways, but you don't have to.

a Rafflecopter giveaway
I have fallen off of the cleaning/organizing/scheduling wagon lately and I'm hoping this will be the tool that helps me get everything back together.

Fingers crossed.

Update

There's a new way to enter that Peekaboo Beans contest down there, so you can earn another entry. Also, the original instructions were to leave a comment to enter but last time I checked we had like 44 entries and 17 comments so I'm going to go ahead and guess that some of you are 10 digit amputees and I've unchecked the "mandatory" box on that one. And one day you will surely repay me by using your toes to type out a short and cryptic comment.

Also, thanks for voting for me for that contest! I got first place but even more importantly, there were so many little hearts by my name and it made me feel really good. This was a pretty great week, all in all.

And last but not least, here are some kitty pictures. I'm sharing them with you because Mr. Ashley said that I am indeed becoming the crazy cat lady of instagram and despite my good intentions to quit, I already posted about cats on twitter again today, so here we are:

It's too much cuteness for one house. 

But Calvin got so stuck in the dishwasher rack today that I thought I was going to have to call the fire department to break him out. Twice.  I had to take the whole rack out to squeeze him back through the slats. He keeps it interesting. And Dom keeps it loud because despite being very mellow, he occasionally wanders around meowing in a sad and pitiful tone. He's very sweet, though. He licks me like a dog, which is nice but weird.

We have more exciting (non-cat) stuff happening tomorrow. 

Peekaboo Beans Clothes Giveaway

So, on to the good things! We have lots this week!

(Because I'm so far behind, but regardless, to you all it will just seem like a big clump of exciting stuff.)

I get an insane amount of email from people with products to review (and videos and kickstarter campaigns and websites and services and shows). I know that seems like a nice problem to have but it is very overwhelming at times, particularly if I'm not sure what is being offered will be of good quality or relevant to our interests. I feel lucky enough that any of you care to read the mundane story of my life--I'm not going to go risking that fortune for a freebie. I only accept if I'm confident I can write about the product honestly, and sometimes I feel a bit of dread as I wait for the package because what if I hate it? Awkward.

I was contacted by a line of children's clothing called Peekaboo Beans and was intrigued but also hesitant, as usual. Boys clothes are often awful, being either obnoxious or babyish. Also, I don't know if I get choosier about clothing quality as I age or if it is really getting progressively worse. There are a few places I've shopped at for years, justifying the higher prices with the fact that both boys got wear out of the clothes since they lasted so long but they don't hold up like they used to. It's stupid stuff like buttons popping off and seams unraveling but for someone who can't sew, that's as good as dead in some cases. The Peekaboo Beans representative compared the clothes to Lululemon and I thought that was a bold claim that would be difficult to live up to. I decided I would do them a favor and not mention that they said that since it was probably pretty unlikely.

They asked for a list of items that I liked and as I looked through the catalog, it was hard to narrow it down. All of the clothes--for babies, boys, and girls were classic and simple but modern and looked practical, comfortable and stylish. I loved the baby boy stuff in particular, since cool clothes that are baby appropriate is a challenging find for boys.

When the clothing arrived, I was really impressed. I could find a million ways to tell you that it was fine if it was just fine...it is really nice. The materials were soft but durable and everything was constructed beautifully. Mr. Ashley saw the items hanging over a chair and asked where they came from, seeming suspicious. I explained and he said, "Those look really expensive. Are you sure you didn't buy them?" Nope, but little does he know, I'm going to buy more and they aren't really expensive.

Both items passed the test of being left to cool in the dryer and the wrinkles fell out immediately (they went from wrinkled in the cold dryer to photos with no fluffing or intervention). Excuse the cell phone pics, I'm an incredibly lazy person and I feel bad about it:

  I like how the collar can be worn either way. The "Hang Loose" jacket also has pockets on the inside.

 little kid loves cargo pockets but I think they always end up looking messy. I like these, though.

Most importantly, the boys loved the clothes. little kid refuses to wear cotton or athletic shorts to school but deemed these "fancy" enough for school or home. He looks adorable in them, I love the length and plan on buying more of the "At Ease" shorts because they're so versatile.

So this worked out awesome for me, but just as nice, it's going to work out nicely for one of you too because Peekaboo Beans is offering a $50 gift certificate for a giveaway! And they weren't full of hot air with their Lululemon-like claims, I guess one of the founders of Lululemon is an investor and is on their Board of Directors and the clothes are so nice I would've made the comparison without that additional information.

You can look through their Fall catalog or the website linked above. Enter to win the giveaway below--rafflecopter is easy. You can win another entry by tweeting about the contest if you're into that sort of thing (and if you are, you better follow me @ashleyfrankly because I swear everyone on twitter hates me):


a Rafflecopter giveaway

Cat's Meow

All in all, we are in kitty paradise over here.

Calvin can barely move without being smothered in kisses or having his preciousness exclaimed over. Dom loves to be stroked and will (briefly) tolerate a hug. I'm so glad we got two--a crazy cat lady needs more than one and their personalities are so different.

We all still miss Pearl. little kid frequently asks about when we will get her ashes and says he just misses her and wants them. Tonight Big Kid cried at bed time, breaking down and sobbing, "My best friend is dead and now I have none. I have to sleep alone forever," which killed me. Unfortunately, the kitties do what they want and if they do sleep in the boys' room, they like little kid's bed. It's kind of a problem.

As much as I love holding the new kitties, sometimes I worry that they are making me forget how she felt. Sometimes I lie still and try to make myself remember how light she was in my arms or how it felt when she purred or the way she always smelled nice despite having questionable hygiene. In the morning Calvin wakes me by chewing on my face or being suspiciously absent and obviously up to trouble, and it's wonderful, but not quite the same as being loved awake each day. Especially at 5:30am.

We love the kitties. Overall we're happy (sometimes I sit for hours with a purring cat on each side of me, so warm and glad that I could explode) but we're also still sad. At least now we have hope...and a lot more to keep up with.

And this week we'll start talking about things that aren't cats, I promise. I am a little worried that anyone who has recently encountered me on instagram or twitter thinks I exclusively post about cats.