Saturday, April 4, 2015

Polish Pick Up

Today as I was leaving the Dollar Store, a guy approached me as I was putting stuff into my trunk.

It made me nervous. I figured he was either going to mug me, try to sell me something, or Jehovah's Witness me.

"Excuse me, ma'am? Are you from Poland?"

What the hell? "Uh...no. I'm from Indiana."

"Maybe that's your heritage, though? I have a friend from Poland and you two could be twins."

"Hmm. No, I'm Irish." I sidled closer to my car and considered stabbing him with my keys if things went downhill.

"Oh. Well, my name's Chris. I just moved here from Kansas."

"Okay. Hi, Chris," I answered, hand on door.

He pulled a folded piece of paper out of his pocket and pushed it towards me. "Look, I don't ever do this but I wondered if I could give you my phone number..."

I waited for him to finish with "--so we can talk about Jesus" or "--so I can tell you about this amazing business opportunity," and he just stood there, looking as uncomfortable as I felt.

Then I realized. "Oh! Oh, wow. No. I'm married. Very married. Kids and all."

"Ahhh, I thought it was worth a try, you're looking good in those yoga pants."

Now, I know the feminist in me should have been mad that he was obviously looking at my butt and 25 year old me would have been exasperated and disgusted but...these things don't happen often these days. I was flattered. Not going to lie. I'm glad I didn't stab him with my keys.

Also, that Lululemon discount is paying off after all.

6 comments:

The Lovely One said...

Creepy or not, that would have made my day! Yoga pants for the win!

Ashley McCann said...

Someone deleted a comment and now I'm dying to know what it said.

LovelyOne, he wasn't my type (rich or good looking, preferably both) but I was pretty pleased for the rest of the evening.

Trilby C. said...

OK, I have to admit, I keep coming back to this post for a chuckle. Not because it's funny that you got picked up - but because I think I'm SOOOO out of the loop that I'm not sure I would have EVER gotten the hint that he was asking me out. Here's to sexy yoga pants!!

P.S. My captcha image word was "sushi" and now that's all I want for lunch!

Julie H said...

I thought it said polish (like nail polish) and I thought maybe he was going to ask you what color you were wearing lol.

Julie H said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kimberly said...

You have to wonder what happens in a guy's life when his game is "are you polish". I had one today at Whole Foods when a guy came at me with "do you like peanut brittle".