Thursday, April 30, 2015

Man in the Mirror

"Mom, did you know that scary thing Bloody Mary is supposed to make your face all bloody and pull you through the bathroom mirror?" little kid asked.

I told him I did know because I was playing that game in third grade too and that it was just imaginary folklore kids use to scare each other.

"Seriously. How would that even work? Pulling someone through a mirror?" Big Kid asked.

"She would smash your head, I guess."

"No. If your reflection pulled you into the mirror, it would replace you outside of the mirror. Both of you couldn't be in there. So to your family and friends it would be like nothing ever happened."

"But what if your friends and family liked the reflection you more? What if we were all like, 'Man, that Big Kid has been extra cool and fun the last two days!" I asked.

"Nope, wouldn't happen. If the me looking in the mirror was a grump, the reflection would be a grump, too. Obviously."

"You're not a grump! You're already extra cool and fun. It's been a long time since you were a gloomy Gus." I assured him.

"Eh, I'm just better at hiding it now. You should hear the things I think!"

"Like what?"

"I spend about 90% of my day thinking, 'Can you just get out of my way?' or 'Would you move your legs -- some of us are trying to get to class!' or 'Oh, is that the one-minute bell? Don’t let me interrupt your leisurely stroll!' Trust me, I am a grump."

"No, I think other people are just annoying. Either that or we're both grumps."

Pretty sure it's everyone else.

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