Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Survivors

I watch survival and wildlife shows every morning. Not because I enjoy survival and wildlife shows (because I don't) but because little kid watches Survivorman and then Jeff Corwin, River Monsters or a nature documentary every single morning. I'm pretty sure he's seen every single Survivorman on Netflix and now we're going back through them. We watch so many of these shows that they all start to run together for me and I have no idea who is who or what exactly they're doing out in the woods.

"Is Survivorman's name Bear Grylls? Or is that someone else?"

"No. 'vivorman is just 'vivorman. Bear Grylls is a whole 'nother guy. We don't watch him like we watch 'vivorguy 'cuz Bear Grylls is always eatin' bugs and drinkin' his own pee. I kinda think he likes to eat bugs 'cuz 'vivorman's urvivin good and he's not eatin' bugs all day. You seen Bear Grylls drink his pee one time and you didn't like it, you 'member? I don't like it either so we watch 'vivorman 'cuz he's not needin' to drink his pee to urvive. Bear Grylls needs to learn to make some sort of water bucket, like wif a suitcase bag or a big giant leaf. Sometin' to catch rain in so he's not drinkin' pee. He should watch 'vivorman! But he might like drinkin' pee and eatin' bugs, I don't know."

Gross. If I had to be stuck in the woods with Bear Grylls or with little kid, I'd pick little kid.

7 comments:

Vee said...

Bear is so much cuter than Vivorman though!

Lin said...

I have to agree with little kid, Bear might like drinking his own pee.

The hubs used to like watching Bear until he went & gave himself an enema in the middle of the ocean & yelled 'god save the queen' (random much?)...that was beyond disgusting. Now we stick to just watching Les Stroud (survivorman), he only eats/kills when necessary & has never stuck anything up his rump. At least not in front of a camera crew :/

Anonymous said...

Survivorman may not have drank his own pee, but I know he's squeezed animal poop and drank the liquid.

Alissa said...

I was totally going to mention the saltwater enema episode too! I equate watching Bear with watching any Housewives of ____ show. It's fun to watch because of the shock value. Bear is always doing crazy ass disgusting shit. Don't get me wrong. I love me some Surviorman too. He's more educational and less shocking but still very entertaining.

Jennifer said...

I think I'm going to go be sick now. I should not have read some of these comments.

Anonymous said...

Has LK seen Swamp People? I am embarrassed to admit it is filmed relatively close to where I live, but it seems right up LK's alley!

Kelli in LA

Unknown said...

I also (unfortunately) remember the episode where he did the saltwater enema. Seemed seriously unnecessary to me at the time. Was that the same episode he skinned a camel or a llama and dragged its dead carcass around, using it as a sleeping bag and a life raft at one point? Yeah, I remember why we don't watch Bear Grylls now.

Kelli, I don't think he's caught Swamp People yet unless Mr. Ashley and him watch it. It's usually on pretty late I think. He'd love it though, for sure. There's also a new taxidermy show that I think he'd like. Unfortunately.