I have survived the move!
I was without internet for 957 days and had physical withdrawal symptoms. Well, it was actually 6 days. But it was a very lonely and sad 6 days. I wasn't even able to stop and tell you all that I had lost my fancy Magnum Sharpie and as a result of that loss, packing came to a complete standstill. Instead of telling you all, I had to just continue packing. Without my fancy marker. It was awful.
Then instead of telling you all that a 4 bedroom house with a 2 car garage didn't fit in a 2 bedroom house with no garage, I had to just keep unpacking those boxes. And move a lot of them onto my ginormous porch. And throw a ton of shit away. And I still have stuff to unpack.
Did you know that I do not suffer from insomnia when there is no internet? Isn't that amazing? I'd rather have insomnia though.
I was in a true panic the first day here when I realized that all of those extra, mostly unused rooms in the other house had actually served as a sound buffer. Suddenly I could hear every dog toenail on the tile, and every single noise the kids made. There was a brief period of time when I decided this house would be perfect if we didn't have kids and then I realized the reason we don't have orphanages around is because people would drop their kids off at moments like this. Because it sounded like a really good idea for a second. I could have kept my office furniture that way.
(It was really nice office furniture.)
But we're all here (even the hedgehog and weiner dog, for the commenter who asked). With all of our stuff. And our teensy tiny fridge and our teensy tiny dishwasher and our teensy tiny washing machine. They have dials, nothing is digital. I forgot how to use washing machines that don't have special little drawers for the detergent. The appliances all say they are "whisper quiet" and then it sounds like a tsunami is approaching when I turn the dishwasher on. There is no pot-filling faucet over the stove but the sink is so close to the stove that I can pretend there is. There is none of that nambsy-pansy "energy efficient" bullshit here though--water shoots out forcefully, the toilets could flush rocks, and the water comes out of the tap so hot that you could boil eggs. So that's awesome, except for the environment and all.
And I love it. Or I will love it. One day. When the maze of boxes is gone and everything is in its place (and everything must have a place here so I will be organized by default) and I'm planning vacations with the money we're saving.
And I'd better love it because I am never, ever, ever, EVER moving again. Ever.