Thursday, March 8, 2012


I've started to write like 5 different blog posts but nothing ever sticks. What is happening with me? Are my kids not as funny as they used to be? Am I too busy with "real life"? I don't know!

I have made a new friend who is very active and social and I think she is partially to blame. She gets me to do stuff like go for long walks on the beach, go kayaking (not even kidding, my lazy self really did go kayaking), and go grocery shopping together. We're even going camping on an island over spring break with the kids and no men. Would old Ashley do that? No sir, new Ashley is actually a little worried about doing that. Because who will carry all of the stuff? And who would fight off any potential bears or serial killers? (Can bears get on an island?) She likes to go to the beach even if it's cold and always has stuff to talk about. So she keeps me busy (and it's hard for me to be busy, but I do like it/her).

Also, I've been having 3 hour breakfasts with assorted other friends and painting my nails and making muffins and cleaning the house, and doing all the stuff I hated other stay at home moms for doing when my kids were younger. It turns out, I am an excellent stay at home mom now that the kids are in school! I might never work again (my husband laughs when I say this, but I am kind of serious). I found my old dollhouse and am refinishing it and that's about the most exciting thing I have going, which is both embarrassing and nice.

I really do think the kids haven't been as funny as usual, but I'll pay closer attention because I'm probably just missing the good stuff. Very unfunnily, two different kids have called Big Kid a nerd this week for his 2 pairs of shoes (sanuks and converse), and I'm torn between tracking them down and beating them with their own stupid shoes or figuring out what shoes aren't nerdy and buying 2 of every pair. Dumb little jerks. I care far more than Big Kid does, but I can't help it. They're just jealous because he's cuter and smarter and dresses cooler than them and I hate them.

I had a traumatic volunteering incident over the weekend that just comes out whiny any time I try to post about it although it was undoubtedly horrific and traumatic. I'm not even going there but I will tell you that this was posted on the door--
(this sign is a regular fixture at someone's workplace. Some people are prohibited from pooping at work!)

and the lady I volunteered with for 11 hours, who talked only about herself that entire time, mentioned that she had diarrhea within moments of meeting me. And that was actually one of the more charming incidents of that entire hell-gotten (is that a word? It should be) day.

Anyway, never volunteering again and I mean it this time! See how I underlined "mean it"? I don't know if I've ever underlined anything. I mean it.


Lin said...

Look at you playing nice with others. Go you! It's great and all that you're out there having fun with your new pal but we miss you on here. For reals.

Also, you're telling me it's not OK to tell someone what type of bowel movement you've had when you first meet them? Duly noted.

Mrs Independent said...

My husband is deployed and he forces me to read your posts to him on the phone. You've definately been missed in his world (I swear he's not a creep).

Julie H said...

Sounds like some good excuses for not blogging!

Julie said...

I wonder what it will be like to be home part-time too when both my kids are in sounds nice! Not nice = no pooping.

Cindy * GoodHaus Design said...

Good to see you today. Wow, a friend that seems like a good influence... and not creepy. That's a new one.

I want to paint my nails and my doll house. :|


Anonymous said...

look at you, all socially and stuff!!! love the underline of the never volunteering, but you know that the school will suck you back in, it always does. its a cult, I tell you, a cult. A cult full of gabbering, loose boweled mommies. *sigh* I am stupid enough to be Vice President of my cult....;)