Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Yoga People

So I went to yoga today.

I have been on a quest for a while now to find athletic activity that I do not despise. Kayaking was awesome, but I'm not strong enough to get mine on or off the top of my truck by myself, so it's always an ordeal. And the actual activity is best when drinking, which you generally aren't supposed to do during exercise, from what I understand. It has become mostly a social activity for me, which is still great but doesn't count as exercise. I've decided I want a paddle board, which won't solve any of the problems listed above but let's pretend it might.

I started jogging on the beach and that was great but mostly only the beach part, not so much the jogging. And then it got so freaking hot, I decided anyone who would subject themselves to that on purpose is flat out insane, so I stopped that until the air contains more oxygen than moisture. (That was my scientific reasoning behind this decision). I did just buy new running shoes though.

Several months ago I decided I was going to be a yoga person (are they called something? See, I haven't even gotten that far). So I pinned some stuff on pinterest and stopped by Lululemon a few times and talked about yoga a bit with some people who sometimes do yoga and today I finally got around to going at our local parks and rec center.

I loved it! Not a lot of jumping and flopping around a la Jillian Michaels (I quit her forever. I've said that before though) and I could see how it could be relaxing.

My particular class was not so relaxing because my adorable, true blue yoga person yoga teacher likes to sing. Like, a lot. More like yodel.

And this is great, good for her for feeling inspired and free enough to sing all of the time like that. That's awesome. And she clearly likes the music. It must feel good.

But it's a bit annoying when I'm balancing precariously on one foot with my arms outstretched trying to find this center of balance she keeps preaching about, to have her burst spontaneously into song. Indian music, which is lovely...but still. Shut up already. Especially during the end part where we just lie there and relax. Come on.

And although I told her I was a beginner, she didn't seem to understand that I wasn't just born with an ingrained understanding of what vinyasa bala hare krishna upward baby cobra was, she would just say this stuff and everyone would do it and when I'd look to see exactly what it was we were doing, she'd calmly and soothingly tell me to relax my neck. About 400 different times. It made it rather hard to relax at all.

She was wearing yoga pants that had probably been washed a ton of times and when she was doing downward dog, you could see EVERYTHING. Which was hilarious. And also made it difficult to relax my neck.

So yoga was funny and I felt like I was good at it, unrelaxed neck and all. I think I will go ahead and be a yoga person, I am just going to look for a different instructor. But maybe sometimes I'll go back for a laugh.

Now I need a paddleboard so I can start doing paddleboard yoga.


Sasha said...

I am way too ADD for yoga. My mind wanders and it's just confusing to me.

Why don't you pretend to run? And just meet some friends for coffee instead. Requires no upper body strength you know.

MTGrace said...

I LOVE yoga. Sadly, in Northern Middle of Nowhere, ND, there are no yoga classes. I have to settle for DVD's and whatever I might be able to find on tv. Makes motivation tricky. But I'm so glad you love it as well! (Just no more creepy see-through-pants-wearing, singing yoga instructors - too distracting!

Anonymous said...

My instructor does the same thing, only she says "Do not pay attention to what others are doing"..I'm trying to figure out the damn move lady!

Unknown said...

You make me laugh out loud...I think you are my inner doppelgänger ....

Cindy said...

What?! I have been to a handful of different yoga instructors, and this is highly... weird. There is NO WAY I could take a yoga class from that lady.

And I wouldn't be able to look away from the train wreck pants, either.

asnell said...

Sorry, I am a yoga HATER. I have no balance and cannot get what they mean by "scoop out your abs". Huh? If I could scoop my abs I wouldn't be doing this horrendous movement.

I like straight up pumping iron and old-type aerobics. Leg lifts anyone?