Saturday, September 28, 2013

Halloween Horrors

"What are you guys going to be for Halloween," I asked the boys over dinner last night.

"I'm still thinking about being Marilyn Monroe," Big Kid piped up. We've discussed this before. He thinks it would be hilarious and while I agree, I'm afraid he doesn't understand the adult implications of dressing in drag. I attempted to explain again.

"Mom, I'm not gay or transgender or whatever!! I like girls and I am a boy! I'm only 10! I just think it's funny--why would anyone care? "

"I don't know that people will care, I'm just warning you that people may either actually think you're a girl or just not get the joke. You can do what you want, I don't care. I'm just explaining the situation."

"It's ridiculous--that I can't be something funny because of other people. I think it's pretty obvious that I'm a boy and that's why it's funny. No one should judge me! I should be able to be what I want for Halloween!"

"No one's saying you can't! I'm just making sure that you know--"

little kid interrupted, "I know! I'm gonna be Hitler!"


"Yes, he was an important guy. He started the Civil War."

"It was World War II, and he was an evil and horrible man."

"Yep. Perfect for Halloween!"

"You are NOT being Hitler! There's not a chance in the world!"

"So he can be a girl but I can't be Hitler? That's not fair. I can be what I want. Who cares if people don't like it?"

"Yeah, but Hitler was a really bad guy, it's not funny."

"The devil is a bad guy and people be's him for Halloween. I'm not tryin' to be funny."

"Well, you're not being Hitler."

"I can be Marilyn Monroe if I want," Big Kid asserted.

I covered my face with my napkin and laughed in the way that I do when I'm trying not to cry.

And when I came home, I pulled up a costume website and talked them into being Slenderman and a skeleton, because I just don't think I can do a night out with Marilyn and Hitler.


Nancy said...

Oh! So so awful that all I can do is burst out laughing. And then feel horribly innapropriate for doing so. Hitler and Marilyn. That'd be quite the Halloween. He had a point with that whole devil business I suppose . . .

mom said...

thank God you talked them out of it!

Preppy Pink Crocodile said...

LK totally has a point with his devil comment. Your kids crack me up!


brianna said...

your kids are to smart. they hold valid points and im not sure how you parent them sometimes LOL.

Anonymous said...

This post was absolutely hilarious!

Julie H said...

OMG your kids are so funny! My friend's son wanted to be a pink flower one year. Somehow she got him to be a police man instead.

Unknown said...

Could have been worse; Big Kid could have decided to be Eva Braun to Little Kid's Hitler.