I don't quite understand why, but the words, "Leave your brother's nipples alone," leave my mouth every single day at some point, usually multiple times a day.
Some days I truly worry about where I failed as a parent or what exactly happened to create this nipple fixation they have. I would say it is their go to torture method. It's bizarre.
Thanks to our miserable experiences with team sports, I have been trying to convince Big Kid to get into martial arts lately. He's indifferent to the idea, only considering it to keep up with little kid's attacks.
"I want to do boxing," he said one day.
"Oh. Boxing?" I asked.
"Do you know...you'll get punched in the head? While boxing?"
"Yes," he answered, shifty eyed, like he didn't really know. "Do they wear head gear?"
"They do. You might want to do something like MMA--I think it's like boxing with kicking too. But I'd start with regular old Karate," I answered, kind of worried about all of the above, to be honest.
"Are you allowed to pinch people's nipples in Karate?" he asked with complete seriousness.
"No. Not at all. You might even learn to defend against nipple pinching, I guess."
"Okay, I'll do it!" He said with excitement. "little kid, there is no nipple pinching in martial arts!" He announced.
Unfortunately, I have a feeling it won't solve our problem.