"little kid, can you please put all of the chairs back where they belong? Not in front of my bedroom door."
"I can't, mumum. I gotta wook."
"You have work? Can you put the chairs up before you go?"
"Not really. I gots wook, wook and more wook. So I can'ts. You can just push the chairs to a side when you wanna get in your room!"
"That doesn't work for me. I need you to put them back where they go."
"Uh....maybe when I's done wookin'. My job is more important 'an some chairs."
This is when I want to scream, "YOU DON'T HAVE A FUCKING JOB!!!! YOU MAKE IT ALL UP!! CLEAN THIS MESS UP BEFORE I LOCK YOU OUT OF THE HOUSE!!!" but I would never do that, of course.
Earlier today he took a full roll of toilet paper, placed it in the sink, drenched it with water and then sculpted it into a volcano. When he heard me coming to check on him, he tried to shove the gigantic mound down the sink drain which did not work and clogged the sink. There is no clear answer as to why he would do this.
Supposedly there's a lady at his work who wears a pretty dress and has a magic rag that makes everything sparkle all of the time. She keeps their offices really clean and she lives on the job site. I asked if she could come visit here, but she won't because she has heard how rude I am to little kid. I suggested that maybe he should see about living on the job site too and he was highly insulted.
3 comments:
See I probably would have screamed that. Or something similar. You are clearly the better mom.
My 5 year old son did that with toilet paper in the sink. Except it wasn't the whole roll. Just a huge wad. He also recently decided it would be a good idea to put soap in the dishwasher for me. And start it.
Yeah. That didn't end well.
reason #67 I do not have kids. I not only would have screamed it, I would have needed someone to point out that was a bad move
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