little kid was just up in Big Kid's top bunk, which is against official Big Kid rules. He wouldn't come down and Big Kid was livid. He tried to appeal to his sense of safety, "You will fall down and crack your head!" and "I think you have disrupted the ladder, you know it's not safe to mess with the ladder," but little kid has no sense of safety. Then he pointed out his issues with little kid's hygiene: "You smell like bad cheese, I don't want you on my bedding!" and "I am not kidding, that's where I sleep, dude!" in a pleading voice but little kid has no regard for clean sheets.
Finally at the epitome of fed-up, he shouted,"You come down right this instant! It is a REQUIREMENT! A REQUIREMENT!! DO YOU HEAR ME RIGHT NOW?"
(A requirement? Really, Big Kid? I LOL'ed and I'm pretty sure little kid did too.)
little kid, always cunning, said, "I can't come down if I probly disrupted the ladder. Do you want me to die?"
"I don't want you to die! I just don't want my sheets to smell like cheese!! Now I don't know what to do--WHY did you disrupt the ladder?!? Why are you up there at all??"
I could tell Big Kid's distress was genuine at this point, I was slightly worried that the ladder may have been disrupted (it hadn't) and it seemed like nothing interesting was going to be happening henceforth so I did finally go in there and yell for little kid to come down. Because I'm a good mom.
And I might even change Big Kid's sheets since little kid does smell a bit like bad cheese.