Saturday, February 7, 2009

Extortion Attempt

I think last week was probably the most boring week ever in the Closet, and I have to apologize to the 4 of you who are left.

Our tenant called and told us that he was moving out. His lease was up a few months ago and he didn't want to re-sign but said he didn't really plan on going anywhere. He was a good tenant and the market sucks so we were okay with this. Although I knew this was going to happen one day, I think I was just trying not to think about it and enjoy life while things were going pretty decently.

I checked around and market rent now is about a third of what we pay for it each month and there are a lot of units for rent in the complex. Majorly sucks.

So I sat down and crunched all of the numbers and the news is not good. Basically, our best hope to get out of this mess is for me to have David Beckham's love child and extort a lifetime of money out of him. There are logistical problems with this plan though, and I don't know if Mr. Ashley will go for it.

After my week long anxiety attack, I'm beginning to feel better. I'm hating myself a little for bad choices made in the past but you know, I didn't have a crystal ball. I knew I was taking a risk because any investment is a risk even if it seems safe at the time. There was some stupidity, along with a series of unfortunate events and it just is what it is and now is the time to cry about it (until I puke) and come up with a new plan.

So, does anyone have David's number?


Allyson and Dave said...

Sorry about your situation...But if it helps at all you are one of millions in that situation. I have a few friends who bought condo's a few years ago and their renters moved out and they had to let it go. It really sucks. But in the end life goes on and everything will work out how it is supposed to. You have wonderful family there to help you work it all out.

DCKate said...

sorry to hear that - what a bummer. we lost a tenant in august and still haven't found a replacement. probably not what you wanted to hear, but just to let you know, we feel your pain!

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry. I think it's really starting to suck for a lot of people right now.

Anonymous said...

Well, If you do get to have David Beckhams love child, fate would have it be a girl, and then you and Posh would have it OUT.

You could even name her Bailey Beckham. It probably wouldn't be all than bad....

Come on Mr. Ashley- Take one for the team!


Carrie said...

We had two vacant rental properties for a while, and it was so stressful, especially when we realized the going rate for rentals was so much lower than our mortgage and so much lower than what our previous renters had paid. So I feel your pain. I hope something works out soon!

KatBouska said...


then try:


then try:

Absolut Vodka

then try:

Giving BK a paper route.

then try:


then try...try...

nothing. You're just plain screwed and I'm sorry.

Unknown said...

5. There's five of us. Even though you never seem to find your way over to my place, I'm still here - glutton for punishment that I am. Once I find one I like, I am disinclined to give it up. So. Refinance the rental unit. Lower your payments. Offer some kind of incentive to a renter. Monthly threesome or something.

Julie H said...

Every time I see one of David B's underware ads I almost faint. God he is hot!

Anonymous said... He is also on Fox Business Channel at 8pm EST every night.

Stereos and Souffles said...

Please don't beat yourself up for past decisions made. Sounds like you took a chance, at least you were brave enough too!! Have a great weekend and do something nice for yourself, you deserve it!

Unknown said...

I LOVE Dave Ramsey! We made huge headway on credit card debt because of him a few years ago and I get tears in my eyes when I hear the people who call him and yell "We're debt free!"

My new life is going to include Dave Ramsey in a major way. Things will end up okay no matter what because I have learned 9 million lessons the hard way and will only know better and do better from here.

It sucks, but it could be worse.

Life, Love And Lola said...

If you get David's number I'll pay you for it. Maybe that will help your situation a little!

Jess said...

I don't have any advice, but wanted to pop in and say that this really sucks. I'm sorry. :( I hope you figure something out. Maybe LK and BK will make it big in showtime. I think LK must have a pretty big bill for damage to personal property by now.

Maddness of Me said...

You could try hookin'.