Friday, February 20, 2009

The Nancy Grace Theory

I have a theory.

Nancy Grace is abducting children so she'll have something to talk about on her show.

It seems that any time a mystery gets solved or a story gets old, there's Nancy with a recent and interesting abduction to investigate, with all new relatives to harass.

I don't know. It seems suspicious to me.

I also secretly suspect that she may be a robot. Her range of facial expressions is just so limited. She does angry, shocked (in an oh-no-you-din't kind of way), and smug. They're all pretty similar and nothing in her face creases. Very strange. Very strange, indeed.

It's something to think about.

19 comments:

Piece o' Coconut Cake said...

Yeah, but why does she always have to come to Florida to do it!?

Preppy Pink Crocodile said...

Oh I think Nancy Grace is a complete loon! She has a robot voice too- sort of curt and mean all at the same time. Even if she is talking about her own kids- she still sounds so mean. And what's the deal with saying everyone's first and last name every bleepin' time she wants to talk to them. Oh and say a wrong answer, you get your full name (probably with your middle name just like your mom did when you were a kid) and then she cuts them off. OK, so I think she's a loon but like the OC Housewives, I sort of can't look away. She's creepy and fascinating all at the same time.

Ashley said...

Coco, I meant to mention that. Trent Duckett, Caylee Anthony and now Hayleigh? That's kept her busy for 3 years right there. All from central Florida. Mmm hmmm.

She ALWAYS sounds mean. She would make me cry even if I didn't do anything wrong. I saw her practically yelling at Hayleigh's distraught grandmother today. She has major "tone" issues.

I used to like her though. I think maybe she's gotten progressively loonier? She used to be amusing, you-go-girl crazy but now I'm thinking she's just scary crazy.

Piece o' Coconut Cake said...

More like she's not gettin' enough sleep dealing with her twins-especially when you have them at that age! Jeez, I don't wish that on ANYBODY. I had Peanut when I was 39 and it was exhausting. Obviously, it still is.

Piece o' Coconut Cake said...

OMG, Ashley, theses people have a HEDGEHOG as a pet! http://thesouthernfamily.blogspot.com/

KelsyC said...

Definitely scary crazy! I think you might be right though... I can't stand her face or her voice! She makes me want to hurt myself!

Anonymous said...

Dh and I have discussed this at length and believe it is her mouth that makes her creepy. It goes crazy!

You may complain that the rest of her face doesn't move but her mouth and lips twitch and dance like crazy. Very fascinating to watch. just her mouth.

Paige said...

By God, you might be on to something here!

ElleBee said...

HAH! My MIL (who lives with us) is freaking OBSESSED with NG. She updates me every.blessed.day. on the most recent news (if you can call it that because it--sadly--NEVER CHANGES!) about Caylee, and now Hayleigh. Even if NG has nothing to do with the kidnappings, she's certainly using them to her advantage. Sad and crazy!

Former Fat Chick said...

DUH, y'all ALL the CRAZIES live in Florida!! I Thought everyone knew that! Hell, that's why I HAD to move here!

Heidi said...

I love when she says "let's unleash the lawyers."

Jennifer said...

Probably too much botox.

Melodie said...

I saw her on Dr. Phil the other day talking about octo-mom and she said something to the effect of the sheriff needs to send a couple of deputies into the fertility doctor's office and not leave until the have his medical license. I was like WTF? And Dr. Phil jumps in with, Well I don't think that's exactly how things work... It was too funny.

Anonymous said...

I laugh and make fun of NG, but when Scott Peterson was on trial I could not tune in fast enough...all day everyday! I got to know all her "panel" members and reporters. I was painting the interior of our house which took waaaaay longer then it should have. Why, you ask? Well I had to stop every 2 minutes to have a sip of diet Coke and watch Nancy and the gang rehash and rehash and rehash again the court proceedings. Best time of my life!

Hee-hee!!!

Sheila from west Michigan

Lindsey said...

I tagged you for an award.
Nancy Grace reminds me of the lady that used to be on MSNBC with two lazy eyes.. this was back in the 90's...

Anonymous said...

"Hello, friieeennd!" My BF and I constantly update eachother on the trash that Nancy brodcasts. It's a running joke in our relationship. Both of us make fun of her, but yet we still watch her. She's like a train wreck; you can't help but stare! Can't wait to tell him this was a topic in the closet!

Kimberly said...

My theory is about Oprah. I now think she is full of shit. This whole coming out thing to admit she is "200 lbs"....

Right. Hello 240.

teachergirl said...

But, people, you can't love or hate my girl, NG, until you've been a chapter meeting with her. And people, I was in chapter with her for years. She is everything that she is on TV plus a little bit more. Drama is her middle name. But I love her - you just can't help it.

Anonymous said...

Why everyday we have this Nancy Grace talking about Caylee Anthony case for hours for months!!! It is absurb! CCN Headline should really change its programs to something better or just reasonable...!!! - We have very low expectations on programs in TV. Still it is insane to hear this over and over again! What's wrong with this country?? It's really all people care about?? Please give us some normal programs. We have enough angry faces on TV!Even at 1 am, I still can NOT escape this story!! - at
1 am on March 10,2009