Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Genius

We all know that I think Big Kid's a genius. The stuff he knows is unbelievable and the way he thinks is really interesting/unusual.

His memory is out of this world. They count their school days, and he can tell you what number school day almost any event happened. Miranda's birthday? 34th day of school. On the 86th day of school, Gabrielle made Kency cry. He was on warning watch the 104th day of school...and so on and so forth.

Add that parlor trick to the long list of saying the alphabet backwards, practicing geography on the weekends, adding columns of numbers for fun, and making up word scrambles for me in his head and it is pretty obvious that he thinks differently.

What completely baffles me, however, is his complete and total inability to figure out underwear.

Underwear. Not a tough concept, we wear it every day, under our clothing, one leg per hole, tag in the back.

Not Big Kid. If I toss a pair of inside-out undies to Big Kid, he balls them up, scrutinizes them, stretches them out, twists them into a rope shape, and will spend ten frustrated minutes trying to figure out how to turn them right side out and get the tag in the back.

If I leave them laid out with his school clothes, he forgets to put them on. He genuinely seems to forget too, he seems as surprised as I am when I bring his lack of underwear to his attention.

If I hand them to him, right-side out and tag in the back, he'll put two legs in one hole.

WHAT THE HELL??

Most mornings it is comical, but sometimes it gets frustrating because it seems like something he should easily be able to master. Every morning we go through it and he gets pissed if I show any sign of exasperation.

Socks also baffle him. We even bought him the type with gray soles...he still puts them on upside down 9 times out of 10.

So, if you want your desktop background and icons customized, he's your man. Just don't expect him to be wearing socks or underwear when he does it.

17 comments:

Ashley said...

That child is something else. Everyone needs a Big Kid.

Ansley said...

Sounds like prime MIT material! He'll be leading the world one day. With a personal assistant to tie his tie.

Cookie Crums said...

This post is awesome! It had me laughing so hard.

I think Big Kid really is a genius. He's going to be one of those adults other adults talk about in awe. "Big Kid is so smart and makes some serious money but his mom still has to help him with his clothes.....I wish I was him."

head_nut said...

It must be boys!! Mine will be 6 in June and does the exact same thing! My 3 year old girl however....master panty puter oner.

GlutenFreeTummy said...

Hey-my big kid is now 8 years old, can explain jet engine thrust in great detail, build a real working deadbolt from his hodge-podge of legos, but still hasnt figured out his socks. I just wanna shake him sometimes!

Charity said...

I think it's the "smart" thing. They have too much going on in their brains for common sense. My 8 year old is one of those kids. She is super smart, does math in her head (even multiplication which they haven't taught yet). She's always in the top of her class and is getting awards for it but she can't do the easy stuff! For example yesterday I went to her awards ceremony. When it was over I told her to meet her sister by the flag pole, walk down to the cross walk lady, cross the street and she will see me. 15 minutes after the bell rang they finally got in. She got lost! She's the smart one!

Amo said...

Please send Big Kid over here to fix my HUMUNGOUS icons that my own 'big kid' made huge. He 'says' that he doesn't know how to fix it...but he's smirking when he says it.

Paige said...

Well I once wore my underwear sideways, and I was probably 30

Karlise said...

LOL! ODS is really smart but the boy lacks all common sense. I just don't get it.

Ashley said...

I was LOLing at the tie comment--and then immediately realized that Big Kid would probably just wear a clip-on bow tie and would think it looked great and was a convenient time-saver. He'll totally be the guy whose salary is envied by his peers as they talk about what an oddball he is.

Charity, I think it is that their brains are just too full on working important stuff out to deal with common sense. I agree with you there.

Amo, he would love to repair and mack out your desktop. We are highly personalized and customized around here thanks to him.

Paige...so some people don't grow out of it? ;-)

Team O said...

Oh my - this has to be one of your FUNNIEST. POSTS. EVER.

Kimberly said...

I forget my panties too. But I do it on purpose.

Joy said...

Oh ours is better Wyatt can't seem to master a shirt, it is almost most of the time on backwards. he is usually good if it has a regular tag but these tagless ones get him everytime, just this morning I walk into his room to make sure he is dressed and the moment I look at him I can tell his shirt is on backwards. One day he wore it backwards ALL DAY at school-seriously did his teacher not notice? in my defence it was winter and he had a coat on when we left so I didn't see it:)

Musings of the Mrs. said...

My husband also doesn't understand about underwear...or the fact that certain pants really do require them before leaving the house.

Christine said...

Me thinks you are raising an engineer. :)

Kate said...

My theory - real smart people have ZERO common sense! My ex husband once asked me for a Phillips head screwdriver. I had to ask if that was the flat one or the one with the cross on it. Then when I was about 25, our car was in the shop. They had it up on a lift with a guy sitting it in. The guy started the engine and then put the car in gear so the tires would spin. I was perplexed. Worse part is, I thought about this for a week before I finally asked my ex why our car didn't drive off the lift when he put it in gear. Yeah, just call me Rainman!

Sasha said...

I read this out loud to Mr. Sasha in the car on the way to Branson today and we laughed for about 5 minutes straight. I *heart* big kid and would love to meet him and introduce him to the Wild Child, who is wise beyond her 3 years. I think it's part of her SPD, but she can carry on the craziest conversations you would never plan on having with a 3 year old.

Hope you are doing well and getting settled into your new place!