Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Debriefing

So, I guess middle school is going well.

I can only guess because every question, no matter how carefully worded, is somehow answered with fewer than 3 words. "It was good." "No, not really." "Yes, I think so." "I'm not sure." "Everyone is nice." "It seems long." That is the Cliff Notes to our entire middle school experience. I might have to resort to waterboarding in order to figure out what is actually going on.

On the first day he came home and announced that his day was great but that he wasn't particularly interested in doing it again tomorrow.

He seems content though and determined to get it right. He takes special care with packing his backpack and coming up with a plan for locker visits for the day. He does well with collared shirts and combination locks and homework. He reports that he still gets lost occasionally, but he doesn't seem bothered by this. He seems to sit wherever at lunch, eating mostly alone which causes a little concern but only for me -- I've stopped asking about it because I don't want to make it weird if it's not.

"You should set some social goals now that you're getting settled in!" I offer.

"You know, I will. That's a good idea," he agrees, probably to shut me up.

I know he's an introvert and I know I should shut up about it but as a mother, it's like I just can't shut up about anything. I hear things I'm saying at the same time I'm thinking that it's annoying that I'm saying those things. He saw all kinds of kids at orientation that were clearly happy to see him, and he was fine with that. Not overly excited to reunite, not anxious or awkward, just cool about it. He does have friends and people he hangs out with socially. Also, it's the third day. So I guess it's fine.

I've just realized this is probably why he doesn't tell me anything. It's the third day! And I'm being this annoying already.

I'm going to have to completely re-work my interrogation tactics.

3 comments:

TH said...

I found, for my new 6th grader, it took her a full 2 weeks to really feel "settled in" and ready to tackle the social aspect of things.

This week alone, she has joined art club, chorus, and signed up to be a library assistant.

Melanie said...

I'm with you on the worrying, but I have to say how awesome it is that he's independent enough to sit alone at lunch and be able to say it doesn't bother him - with a straight face. I still can't eat alone, but wish I didn't care what others think if I did. I know he will be great. It us moms who suffer.

Rachel said...

It's so hard as they get older. I have an introvert that is in 7th grade- I have the same worries about friends and eating lunch alone- but he is opposite of your big kid in the organization dept- he could CARE LESS about most other things- he does not plan out anything, backpack is grabbed last minute with the hope that what needs to be in it is actually in it- wears what he wants, even if it looks goofy... OMG it's so hard for me not to try to "control freak" on him but that always backfires. He has taught me just to let go and let him handle it and it mostly works out just fine (a few late or missing assignments here & there) but nothing traumatic!

Also, I found this when school started and all 3 of my kids thought it was fun to answer: http://www.simplesimonandco.com/2014/08/25-ways-ask-teens-school-today-without-asking-school-today.html and helped me learn a bit about their day :) There's one for younger kids too: http://www.simplesimonandco.com/2014/08/25-ways-ask-kids-school-today-without-asking-school-today.html