Shopping is what brought us all together in the first place. The Chaws were playing "Chaw Not to Wear" and I ended up being everyone's stylist and I thought it would be a fun idea for a blog. Then I got sick of it and started bitching about my kids, and here we are.
So here are a few outfits I would buy if I wasn't:
This first outfit is something I would actually wear, especially if it ever cools down here enough to wear some long sleeves and jeans again. I am missing my jeans damnit! Summer was fun, I'm over it now. Those jeans look like they would hide the muffin top too, I like that. I love, love, love the shoes, they are practical and look comfortable and playground mulch would have a pretty tough time getting in there. I love the necklace (I heart Etsy, I really do) and I think the purse looks like it costs more than $30.00 and it reminds me of my couch, and that's a good thing because I am pretty fond of the couch.
I can't add, or do any other kind of math really, but judging by the stores, this outfit would probably be within my financial reach. Mr. Ashley would probably say it is not, but what does he know? God, like making all the money, paying the bills and actually being aware of our finances makes him some sort of expert or something. Not. Besides, why did God invent credit cards if not for me to use them? Huh? Yeah, that's what I thought.
Gap Dress $80.00, Banana Republic earrings $30.00, Piperlime Shoes $70.00, Banana Republic Bangles $42.00, Banana Republic satchel $140
I would feel pretty in this dress and it would look good with my hair. This is more of a fantasy outfit, not so much because of the price (that too), but more because where the hell would I wear it? The one time a year Mr. Ashley and I have date night? AKA my birthday? I wish.
I wasn't originally going to go with those shoes, but I think those shoes would go great with my bridesmaid dress for Katy's (aka Catfish's) wedding and this was the easiest place to put it so I wouldn't forget about them. Katy is a shoe designer (coolest job E.V.E.R., remind me to tell you about the glamorous life of my cool, kid-free friend Katy), so I can't be the jerk that wears ugly shoes to her wedding. These aren't ugly, right? Anyhoo, I think they're fine with this dress too. It's my closet, I'll put whatever I damn well please in here.
Instead of this outfit I should have shown you Cinderella's gown and her glass fucking slippers, because this is about as likely to happen as that. A girl can dream. Where the hell is my fairy godmother anyway? Honestly, I'm not sure that I'm tall enough for red pants, but I do think that shirt would hide the muffin top. Do you like how hiding the muffin top is the #1 consideration? Because those of you without muffin tops...should have no problem picking out your own damn clothes.
I looooooooooooooooooooove that purse and those shoes. What is it with me and J. Crew shoes? Why do I even look? A $395 purse? That's a car payment. Damn, I know I can't keep up with The Aroras...why do I even try?
(editor's note: there is a national movement underfoot, started by me, to change "Keeping up with the Joneses" to "Keeping up with the Aroras"...please make a note of it and help me out with that. Do the Joneses have two front loading washers and dryers? A closet of designer shoes? The Joneses suck, screw them).
So there is your shopping for today. Do you know how long it took to put this post together? Waaaaaaaay longer than it takes me to do some bitching & whining and hit "publish post", that's for sure. I was really big on this shopping stuff when I still felt the need to buy your love. Now I've gotten comfortable and lazy with you all. Now you know how Mr. Ashley must feel. Awww, sucks to be you guys.