Due to the current economic crisis, we can no longer support your lifestyle of peeing and pooping in diapers. I know that this may be upsetting to you and I understand that your time is valuable and having to take potty breaks interferes with "living in the moment" (and destroying stuff).
However, these are tough times and we're all making sacrifices.
Also, you know your daycare provider whom you adore and who bakes you cakes on a weekly basis because you love cake? Yeah, you'll only be seeing her once a week from here on out. This will be hard for both of us, and no, I won't be baking any cakes.
Basically, it sucks to be you, little buddy. The fat cats are getting hit hardest and you are our resident fat cat. It's time to put on your big boy undies and deal with it.
Thank you for your cooperation.