Friday, March 27, 2009

Dear little kid,

Due to the current economic crisis, we can no longer support your lifestyle of peeing and pooping in diapers. I know that this may be upsetting to you and I understand that your time is valuable and having to take potty breaks interferes with "living in the moment" (and destroying stuff).

However, these are tough times and we're all making sacrifices.

Also, you know your daycare provider whom you adore and who bakes you cakes on a weekly basis because you love cake? Yeah, you'll only be seeing her once a week from here on out. This will be hard for both of us, and no, I won't be baking any cakes.

Basically, it sucks to be you, little buddy. The fat cats are getting hit hardest and you are our resident fat cat. It's time to put on your big boy undies and deal with it.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Sincerely,
The Management

12 comments:

Stereos and Souffles said...

Too funny!

Anonymous said...

Good Luck with this one!

Maggie said...

Hilarious!!

Jennifer said...

I'm sure he's plotting his revenge at this moment.

Anonymous said...

LOVE it!!! It seems I have the bye bye diaper talk DAILY with my son... its good to see someone else echoing the same issues!! I bitch about buying Pull-Ups EVERY time Im at the register, fantasizing about the day where having to remember to get them will be a thing of the past! P.S. What kind of cakes was L.K. getting served?! Lucky duck! MY babysitter when I was little would tell me to sit down and have a Coke and a smile. HUH.

Unknown said...

He chooses the flavors--he's had chocolate, strawberry and vanilla cakes so far. If he so much as hesitates to put his shoes on, she offers to bake him a cake to make him happy.

She had to tell him no when he wanted to eat a piece of her older daughter's unsliced birthday cake and she's been making it up by baking them for him weekly ever since. It is way, waaaay out of control (but very sweet, pun intended).

Julie said...

This is my most favorite post ever. Maybe it's just the mood I'm in on this glorious Friday but I had to read this three times then cut, paste and send to the office girls. Thank you so much for the smiles and laughs.

Anonymous said...

I ordered a DVD from Huggies on how to potty-train. Of course it told us everything we have been doing is wrong and all the "primitive" advice we have received from others should be ignored, lmao!

I too wish I could get rid of this expense and the pull-ups cost more. I'm thinking the pull-ups are the marketing bastards way of getting more money from us.

I'm ready to just let him pee himself until he is too ashamed to sit anywhere but the potty.

Buttercup

courtney said...

Okay, when oldest son was at that stage where I no longer wanted to tend to man poop...I strolled him through the toy aisle and he pointed to what he wanted. Then I strolled him through the diaper aisle and told him it was toilet or toys, take your pick! He stared peeing on the potty and I still didn't buy him toys!
Evil!!

Good Luck...I have the twins to look forward to potty training. Must beat head against wall now!

Michele said...

Hysterical LMAO! I've got an exact replica of your "Little Kid" here and we're in the same situation. We just instituted the big boy undies policy.

PaperCourt said...

Lay down the law, Ashley!

Jackie H said...

oh man. My mom put every ounce of her being to ensure that I was completely potty trained by 17 months. So she didn't have to pay for diapers anymore.

Then she had two more kids- and she didn't have any willpower left.

Good luck!