Thursday, November 19, 2009

Boy Toys (not the fun kind)

All the toys for girls are more fun.

Barbie houses with elevators? A printer that works on your nails? A cupcake maker? Who wouldn't want to play with that stuff? I want the new Barbie camper for Christmas and I'm not kidding one bit. It looks fun and I should get stuff to play with too, especially if I'm expected to play.

I know I can buy this stuff regardless of who it is marketed to, but Big Kid is already way cootied out by girl stuff (although I believe he secretly longs to play with these things, and has admitted that it's fun to have girl friends so you can play with their toys) and little kid would play with it but would rather have a vehicle of destruction versus a pink recreational vehicle, so I think we should buy this stuff for me so that we can all enjoy it together.

All 3 of us want the cupcake maker, but it irks Big Kid to no end that the company is called "Girl Gourmet". It burns him every time the commercial comes on. Boys like cupcakes too.

I want to get him a Nintendo DS Lite for Christmas this year and I thought it would be easier to find a deal than it has been so far. They're $30 off at Wal-mart on Black Friday, but is $30 off worth potentially getting trampled to death for in the early hours of the morning? I'm not really thinking so. But $130 is a crazy amount of money for 1 gift for a 6-year-old. Everything little kid wants is inexpensive and easy (mostly GI Joes and Dinosaurs), but stuff Big Kid is into is pricey.

little kid is pretty freaked out to discover that Santa's gift giving is behavior-based. Big Kid told him you get socks and underpants if you're bad, and now every time he's in time-out (so about 17 times a day) he cries, "Santa's only gonna get me socks and pants! I'm gonna make good toices from now on."

I've tried to assure him that so far this year he's probably been good enough to get some Santa gifts, but that he should be a very good boy from now on. Soon after that conversation, he tried to climb to the top of the fridge and knocked down a glass jar of honey, which exploded on the kitchen floor. THAT was a bitch to clean up. If there was a Santa, I'd be very concerned for little kid.

Big Kid is home from school today because he woke up with a slight cough yesterday and seemed warm. Today he was insistent that he was still sick and he needed to stay home so that he didn't cough germs on people, but I haven't heard a whole lot of coughing. Yesterday he was insistent on little kid remaining a certain number of feet from him to avoid infection, and would become near hysterical if that line was crossed. I'm thinking he may have a small cough and a great plan to skip school and keep little kid at bay.

I would like to thank Dora the Explorer for encouraging my kids to yell out "BANANA PANTS" several times as I've attempted to write this post. I'm sure it was super educational for my kids and having a chorus of people scream out "BANANA PANTS" at random intervals makes for ideal writing conditions. Maybe one day a group of moms could get together and scream "BANANA PANTS" at the writers of Dora the Explorer as they go about their day, so they can see just how funny it is.

(Although that really would be pretty funny...)

19 comments:

jennyandcompany said...

my 9yo is also miffed about the cooking and candy making toys being for girls, but I found a "sour candy factory" in a catalog (then found it much cheaper on amazon) that i'm hoping will suffice.

Unknown said...

BANANA PANTS!!!!!

Which you should by for the little guy for Christmas.

KatiePerk said...

Have you ever heard of Elf on a Shelf? It aids in forcing our nephews into behaving around the holidays because the Elf directly reports to Santa. (And the elf is kind of creepy looking and I think this also motivates them to behave)

Theresa said...

Fuck Dora. That bitch causes me a lot of angst, but the kids seem to love her and her damn Banana Pants or whatever else they have to yell out. I can't believe I'd actually rather watch Diego and listen to Rosie Perez say, "Click, take a pic!" I guess that is the life I've chosen. Good luck with that today.

Preppy Pink Crocodile said...

Do you have an Elf On The Shelf book and elf? If not, you need one!

p jane said...

Hey, BananaPants beats BANANA HAMMOCK!! any day. (Ummmm, nope, no idea where they heard that...oh wait, it was that episode of Scrubs I couldn't be bothered to turn off...)

And youngest son asked hubby what Bosoms meant, so now he (son) announceds randomly in the grocery store, "Bosoms is a NICE way to say Boobies." Thanks a lot iCarly promo featuring Lubert ranting about his former girlfriend...

Anonymous said...

Not sure what brand it is, but I just saw a cake baking/decorating toy at Target with Duff, from Ace of Cakes, on the box. It was right next to the Cupcake Makers and Easy Bake Ovens. I'd definitely look into it.

Misty said...

I am running into the $$ prob. with my 7 year old. All he wants are video games and I keep thinking after I spend the 300 on the games.. it's going to look pretty sad that he's opened 5 small games. lol

Unknown said...

Just FYI we have the Girl Gourmet cupcake maker and it makes the WORST cupcakes ever! You microwave bake them. Daddy gets force-fed these things because Silly Santa brought a ton of refills and no one else will touch the things. I actually once caught him flushing one. Consider yourself warned of the toxic cupcakes!

Maddness of Me said...

I want the Barbie Dream Jet so bad I might have a stroke.


but what is this cupcake maker of which you speak?

Jamie said...

Oh my goodness. You need to repost your elf on the shelf story from last year! I laughed my ass off while reading it! I just had to go back and read it again! It makes my day :)

SuddenlySouthernCyndi said...

I don't comment on your posts near enough (I could say that about my readers, too) but I just had to say as the mother of two boys as well (no girls) I miss getting to play with girls toys and I'm going into serious pink withdrawal here. Also, sorry about that glass jar of honey fiasco, sounds horrid.

Jennifer said...

Just thought I would share this with you... A screaming deal for a DS Lite at toys r us... http://view.ed4.net/v/Q9YKHL/ROGQ1/4019TS1/YMM0Y/MAILACTION=1&FORMAT=H... We can thank the bargain board for that deal... Hope this helps...

Unknown said...

Jennifer, can you email that to me at ashleysclosetblog at yahoo . com? Blogger does weird things to links. Thanks super duper much in advance.

Anonymous said...

It is too bad Hasbro discontinued the "QueasyBake" Cookerator -- a boy's easy bake oven. It came with gross boy-oriented baking mixes like "dip 'n drool dog bones" and "mud & crud cake." Oh well.....

Beechwood 4-5789

Kim said...

I completely agree that girl toys seem like more fun. My 5 year old really wants the cupcake maker as well, and he oddly doesn't seem bothered by the fact that it's the Girl Gourmet. I'm still torn as to whether or not we'll get it for Christmas. I seriously wish we could get a Barbie up in this house.

Julie H said...

LMAO

BANANA PANTS!!

I've missed that since we've moved out of the Dora territory. Not too sad about that. That map song used to just about drive me bonkers though.

Anonymous said...

King Juan el Bobo is an episode about a mentally retarded adult and is a great means of teaching little ones tolerance, but it's a shame the producers of Dora the Explorer allowed "banana pants" to be the words kiddies are asked to shout out througout the show. The writers are to blame for this episode. Having little toddlers yell out the punchline to a dirty joke is incredibly inappropriate, but even Disney writers and animation artists have been doing dirty stuff for decades, so I guess you can't really get away from it.

Anne said...

Your blog post just made me smile because it took me forever to figure out where my 4 yo picked up this banana pants thing. She would yell it out and start laughing. I had no idea it was from dora until the episode aired again recently. Too funny! Also, this morning my 3 yo was downstairs watching tv with my husband and I woke up to her yelling out "MAP!". Dora is a big hit in our house:)