Monday, June 1, 2009

Last Day

Tomorrow is Big Kid's last day of Kindergarten. We'd put him on suicide watch if there was any risk of him ever touching anything sharp, swallowing anything, jumping, or doing anything dangerous whatsoever. He is just so sad about school being over.

Any time I mention the last day, he starts doing the fast blinking to hold back the tears. He looks up, blinks fast over and over again, and does this funny thing with his mouth to stop his chin from quivering. When I ask him what's wrong, he tells me that he feels "motional" about school ending. ('motional is the word of the week around here. Big Kid is 'motional about lots and lots of stuff lately. little kid bit Big Kid yesterday, and he was 'motional about it hours later still.)

There are no promises or consolations able to ease Big Kid's pain, either.

“I'm gonna miss my friends, mom. I'm gonna miss my class and my teatser. Dey are all great and I'm gonna miss dat, no matter how much fun stuff we do. I feel really motional about it every time I fink about it,” he said while starting to cry that he would probably never see Ahsiya or J. again.

As luck would have it, I ran into Ahsiya's mom today, who stopped me to tell me that she had told Ahsiya that Big Kid was switching schools and that she had collapsed in a heap of sobbing, saying that she couldn't go to a school without Big Kid, and crying for over an hour despite the entire family's attempts to cheer her up. I told her how "motional" Big Kid was about it, and we went ahead and exchanged numbers and promises to get them together this summer.

Then I saw J.'s mom. She's the one who didn't help Big Kid get lunch, and relayed the tales of my negligence to me throughout the year. We ended up talking a lot at a birthday party from hell we mutually attended, and by the end of it, I swore that I had mistook her and that there had been some odd social awkwardness going on and that perhaps I had unfairly villified her. At this same birthday party, I had mentioned that we should get the boys together over summer and she didn't respond. At all. It struck me as weird, but we were in a busy place and I began to doubt if she had heard me.

So when I saw her today, I told her that I'd like to exchange numbers to get the boys together, and told her how much I enjoyed their friendship. She laughed and said they were cut from the same cloth and showed me a bunch of photos she had of her son and Big Kid. I put her number in my phone and told her I'd call her, and all seemed well.

Then Big Kid was bouncing around on our bed when he got home and said playfully, "Mrs. P. (J.'s mom) said 'I can't wait for summer because it means the end of Big Kid! No more Big Kid!' And I just told her, 'I'm gonna get your phone number Mrs. P. and J's gonna come to my house and I'm comin' to your house too!"

I pressed Big Kid as to what she said then, or if he thought she was silly for teasing like that, and he changed the subject and seemed unconcerned. She had to be kidding, I think, and if Big Kid didn't react in any way other than to tease her back, maybe this is how they act with each other? Or he certainly could have misrepresented what happened, we all know that's possible. I don't know, I'm a big kidder and I can't see saying that, even jokingly, to a 5 year old friend of my kid's, but who knows.

Why can't my kid make friends with kids whose moms I want to be friends with? I'm just going to drop it, and if Big Kid insists I guess I'll invite J. over and her response will probably be a good indicator.

I'm excited for summer. Tomorrow is our family summer kick off party. I suggested matching shirts, but Mr. Ashley vetoed that. I'm thinking balloons, cupcakes, and family game night. And possibly alcohol--maybe I'll drink some drugs in celebration of no more car rider line or morning traffic or drug and alcohol education programs or awkwardness with weird moms.

11 comments:

Mama Kat said...

I'm a big kidder too and I would not say that to any child smart enough to know what I was talking about.

Sometimes I ask the two year olds if they think I'm prettier than their moms and they just answer yes to every little word that comes out of my mouth.

But they don't get it.

That lady is weird. I'd be so embarassed if I were her and happened to stumble upon these awkward posts. She makes me feel good about myself.

Kira said...

BK so needs a journal. Tell me he has a journal! That shit would be priceless in a couple decades... As for Mrs. P, when in doubt - delegate! Skip the middle-mom and have BK call J. If J is mysteriously busy all the time, then you've got your answer and you don't have to actually hear the brush-off.
Remind BK that the great thing about new schools is that he can be anyone he wants to be because nobody knows him! Which means for him, that nobody will ever know how he was on warning (or whatever it was, don't make me look it up).

Joy said...

Yea she does seem weird. I am at my son's school all the time and have really gotten close with alot of the kids in his class and I can't see saying that to a 5yr old. or 6-7yr old for that matter.

I am also SOOO glad to be done with car rider line, I have been so over it for a while

Amo said...

In NC, the schools are year-round. Since we haven't started kindergarten yet, I'm not sure if my 'Big Kid' will be happy about that or not...

Also, the 'possibly crazy' mom, I'd let that one go. There is a reason first impressions are memorable. (Not to mention, you've had more than one run-in.)

Jenn said...

Honestly, I've been brought to tears by moms just like her.

Once a mean person, always a mean person?

I'd imagine your first impression was your truest impression; I'm relieved for you that you don't have to subject Big Kid to her again.

And possibly alcohol? Better get yourself to a doctor...you don't sound like yourself. ;)

Jennifer said...

I can't stand this woman and her passive agressive bullshit... whether she was joking or not.

I think I would casually try to bring it back up and see if he overheard her say it or if she said it to him. Because if he overheard her then you know she really meant it.

mommy dearest said...

Mrs. P. sounds like a bitch. Who says that to a kid? Even jokingly?

Lilian said...

Why, oh why would anyone say such a mean-spirited thing to a child? She kiddeth not, methinks. She wants no part of BK, Ashley - nevermind her child's obvious love for all things BK. Just vicious. I see misery in her future...karma doesn't like people who're mean to kids. Grrr!

PaperCourt said...

That woman sounds like she has some issues! Who would say that to a 5-year-old...or anyone for that matter?

so tired said...

I like to make friends with the Moms I like and then force my kids to be friends with their kids. The people I choose to be friends with typically have a similar parenting style as me. So the kids are usually nice kids.

mizryan16 said...

Nah, don't even try to befriend Mrs. P. She seems like a real bitch. Who says shit like that, anyway? What a spaz.