Tuesday, June 16, 2009

This Means War

Another fucking poop bomb.

I am LIVID.

LIVID.

It was in another section of the yard too, and whoever put it there had to come into our yard to do so. That really takes crazy to a whole nother level.

It's 8:00 a.m. and I feel like my whole day is ruined because I'm so angry about this. I have been militant about making sure the dogs are tied to their stakes while they are out and that their lines aren't long enough to reach anyone else's yard.

Mr. Ashley is going to confront the suspect again when he gets home (I think it has to be the neighbor's husband) and now that trespassing is involved, her "sending a message" to the offender is no longer satisfactory.

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think Mr. Ashley might be too soft for this job, make sure he lays into them. That's ridiculous. I would be furious too.

Eh... I have more of my mother in me than I thought. But I would totally be launching cat poo. We had a neighbor once who was just horrible, she had even harrassed my grandma when she lived there. My mom, who worked at a deli/meat market, sent my sisters over to her driveway with a pigs head. It was all very Godfather-esque. Probably not a good decision, but she never knew who did it, and the high school was chattering about the horse/dog/bear/human head for a week.

Life, Love And Lola said...

I say you bake her some SHIT BROWNIES!

Kristin's Gang said...

I personally think that you should scoop up the shit, put it in a brown paper bag and light it on fire at their front door...I know, it's an oldie but a goodie and has been done before. When they come to the door, their initial reaction will be to stomp on it to put it out...and instant revenge!!! Just be very careful not to burn their house down...LOL

Former Fat Chick said...

OMG! The pig head is the BEST thing I have ever HEARD!

Jennifer said...

I really do not understand the mentality of these people. That is just beyond bizarre.

Maybe you should talk to some more of the neighbors and see if it has ever happened to them.

Anonymous said...

I am so sick of your shitty neighbors. Here is what I would do. Call the police. With two small, intrepid explorers in your yard shit bags are health hazards. Tell them oh-so-innocently that your neighbor told you SHE knew who it was, maybe they should go talk to her and get it out of her. That way you don't have to directly accuse and go to all-out war with passive-aggressive people who will only escalate. Maybe this way will A) scare some sense into them while B) allowing them to save face so they don't feel compelled to find another lowest common denominator to sink to.

THEN if you found another poop misile it WOULD BE ON.

But that is just me. I would be ready to tear some hair out!!!

Shell said...

It could be worse...see video clip...ha, ha!

http://www.rottenneighbor.com/story.php?id=211562_neighbor_throws_poop

Joy said...

I am gonna send my neighbors a message about their f'ing dogs pooping in my flower garden around my mailbox! I was pissed when I saw it yesterday and something WILL be done about it as in a bb in the dogs behind the next time I see them in my front yard!

katie b said...

Is it possible that someone else's dog is crapping in their yard and they think it's your dogs? I'd be pissed at this point. But Mr. Katie and I are both lawyers so I wouldn't be going over anymore - I'd be sending a nasty letter threatening some type of legal recourse and police intervention at this point!

Melisser said...

You should watch "Birds of America" for a good follow-up idea from Matthew Perry.

Renee said...

WTF?!?! This is total BS.

-The Renee

Anonymous said...

i told you it was not over. i told you that she who 'lies nicly' is still a lier. and i still think the cat poop in the pool idea rocks.

Head Nut said...

what a cunt! i would totally call the poo-poo and let them handle it. ITA with the PP about telling them how your hubs went over there and she said she knew who was doing it and she would "send them a message". Or you could get a pigs head.

Mom2Gizmo said...

OMG....I would be so pissed! Time for video surveilence....

peggy and The Cats said...

Please tell me you are documenting this. Then find an attorney to draft a letter you can deliver to ALL your neighbors (so no one feels left out). Than file a complaint with the cops. Obviously talking nicely is not going to work. I'd probably rent a motion detecting camera for a month or so, just so I could show the footage at my next party.

Jillian said...

I'm with Mom2

Anonymous said...

Video surveillance all the way.
While building our house, we had teens vandalizing the house at night and really causing problems. We bought some look alike/fake cameras and installed them outside. It did the trick. But, in your case, I would REALLY want to know who is doing this so opt for the real thing and catch them red handed.I hope it is kids and not adults because that is just crazy!

Or just call the cops. This is getting ridiculous!

Amy said...

I would send Mr. Ashley over to "she who knows" and say ever so sweetly.... "We've got a detective on the case. Not only is this person a poop bomber but the detective thinks they are responsible for the break-in we had, the pet mutilation and (anything else you can think of). I think when we get this guy, they're going to be spending a quiet a little bit of time in jail. Our detective wants to get him bad! But good news, they got some DNA off of the last bag of poop that matches the break-in fingerprints! Did you know the poop in that bag isn't even from one of our pets?"

Etc.... anything you can think of to make her squirm! That's what I would do....But I don't play well with others!

Heather said...

i do like the idea of a flaming bag of poo at the front door.

or poo wrapped nicely in a tin as a treat. lots of adorning ribbons, etc. on the tin. perhaps mailed to them.

only problem is...the loss of being anonymous.

time to think outside the poo...

SkitzoLeezra said...

Holy crap in a plastic bag!
Do I have a suggestion for you - spied this on Craftster.org today.
Paint a target on wood and place in lawn for flying poop contest.
See link below for illustration.
http://www.craftster.org/forum/index.php?topic=309522.msg3551211#msg3551211

Marissa said...

Yuck!!

Missives From Suburbia said...

Do you happen to be Anne Nahm's neighbor?

http://annenahm.com/?p=1383