Thursday, May 17, 2007

MISSING: Beloved Remote Control, Black w/Buttons, REWARD

My Remote Control is gone. Totally missing. I have torn the house apart.

We had a playdate today and I highly suspect the big kid and his little girl friend of squirreling it away somewhere. This is a catastrophe. Honestly, it's a spankable offense. I don't really spank, not because I disagree with spanking, but because that little punk can run faster than I can.

So my television is stuck on Noggin, of all channels. Freaking Noggin, story of my life. The swat team could be surrounding my house, live on all networks, with a serial killer on the roof and I'd be inside watching Moose A. Moose and his friend Zee count worms. Good God. Tonight I've seen 3 episodes of Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Suite Life of Zach & Cody and DeGrassi: Porn for Pre-teens. Either I'm too old or these kids are too old, but someone is too old. No wonder these kids are all sexed up, it is clearly Noggin's fault. Oh I guess it's "The N" or some such crap at night. It's just not right.

Please everyone think positive thoughts about my remote. I really can't take much more of it. I will offer a $50 reward and my undying devotion to whoever finds it.

5 comments:

Autumn said...

You are going to be the reason I get fired from my job(other than my excessive internet use, abuse of the telephone, and extended lunch breaks.)
Laughing my a$$ off! It keeps getting better and better!
Autumn

Ashley said...

Well if you got fired, you could spend some time brainstorming about where the hell my remote control could be. So someone would benefit (ME!).

I'm glad you're enjoying it. I am too ;-)

mlatulip said...

Maybe your remote ran away, because it was jealous of Chase's imaginary remote. Check the closet. Maybe it's hiding there.

Ashley said...

Chase = the big kid and he does have an imaginary remote control. It could certainly have something to do with this mystery.....hmmmm. How to torture the info out of him?

I've checked the closet :( All of them.

ME ME ME said...

Pre-kids, I never lost things. Ever. Now I "lose" things almost daily. I'm pretty sure my kids like to put things in trash cans, which is a crying shame. I hope the Remote turns up. You can always get one of those universal remotes but they are a pita to set up.