Tuesday, May 15, 2007

What Am I Doing Here?

So I had this Big Idea to start a blog in February, because I was having fun virtual shopping and putting together some outfits for friends of mine. Like all of my Big Ideas, I got tired of it, saw the next Big Idea in the future and abandoned the project entirely. I've been thinking of it again (because I always eventually feel guilty about the abandoned Big Ideas) and I believe it could be fun, especially if I could talk about whatever I want (read: bitch about these damn kids). I really don't need anything else to encourage this nasty, nasty internet addiction that I suffer from but like all addicts I'm going to go ahead and play the Denial Card in order to continue on my merry way.

Anyhoo, Here is my confession for the day that also conveniently ties into the title of my blog: sometimes I hide from my children in my closet. I make sure they're safe first. I put the little one in his cage and make sure the big one is busy or distracted enough for me to run and hide and then I go in there and sit on the floor for a moment. A girl's gotta think every once in a while and it's just not possible when hearing "C is for Cookie, it's good enough for me, mwah mwah maaaa" 40 million freaking times a day thanks to that great toy some genius gave them.

I love my kids, they're a blessing, they are the cutest kids in the world, blah blah blah, but it's not always easy. The little one is a real Terror and the big one's always asking questions and wanting stuff and they both use me as a human jungle gym. They can both be perfectly happy and I swear, one of them will look up and realize that I'm relaxed and the whining and crying starts up pronto. Geez Louise. So after a few hours of this routine, it's into the closet with me. I even have a magazine in there. I swear it's only for a minute or two but that's enough to readjust sometimes. I used to use the bathroom but they caught onto that and make it a point to ensure that one of them is either in the room staring at me or screaming at the top of their lungs while I am trying to do my business. Seriously, isn't going poo in peace a basic human right of some sort? I'm pretty sure it is. If not, it should be.

So maybe I'll take up the blog again with the following conditions: 1. It cannot interfere with real life more than the computer already does (hmmm, perhaps I could take the computer into the closet!) and 2. I cannot get mad if no one reads it. After all, how many people are going to want to read about the crazy days of a bored stay at home mom to two really odd children? The kids are funny and all, but certainly not sensational. I'll also talk shopping because really, that's what life is all about. Stuff. Cute stuff. The stuff I can't have. But we can look and we can dream and we can pretend we're shopping for real with the occasional break to wipe a poopy butt or to sit on the closet floor with our hands over our ears. Now let's begin.

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