Thursday, June 7, 2007

Life's Big Questions

Babies and dog water bowls and/or litter boxes...what's the attraction? It is like he sits there all day and plans his next opportunity to get over there and pour slobbery water all of the kitchen floor and/or attempt to eat cat turds.

Kitchen duty...every day? forever? really? I have a hard time wrapping my mind around that.

$36 Bibs? How about just taking the kid's shirt off to eat and wiping them down afterwards? Nature's bib, Free, Duh. (I hear these are all the rage amongst the Canadian crowd. I can't believe we haven't found an excuse to invade that country yet. Isn't being different enough of a reason these days? $36 bib, that is just nuts.)

If there is such a thing as truth serum, why would there ever be a need to torture information out of people? (This thought came to me while I was learning about waterboarding, who thought of this? Don't ask why I'm researching torture techniques. Trust me, you don't want to know.)

Why the hell does Yahoo make me sign back in WHILE I'm in the middle of typing an email?

Someone explain the relevance of daylight savings time nowadays? Other than to screw up all of my clocks, phones, cameras and sleeping habits?

Why don't Lindsay Lohan, Paris Jailbird Hilton and Nicole Ritchie get chauffeurs instead of driving while intoxicated? When I get rich, I'm never driving again. I'm never washing my own hair again either.

Are you old if:

*You think Chris Hansen from Dateline's To Catch a Predator is fuckable?

*You think Anderson Cooper is so hot you can look past the gay thing?

*You hate Heelys or whatever the hell those flying monkey shoes with wheels are called?

*You delight in giving the stink eye to annoying young people when their parents aren't looking?

*You heard that song that goes, "Thisiswhy, thisiswhy, thisiswhy, thisiswhy, thisiswhy, thisiswhy, thisiswhy I'm hot" and you thought they were talking about Vichyssoise soup?

Don't answer those last five. I'm really tired. There is a good chance I'll wake up in the morning and vow to never blog late at night while slightly slap happy again.

4 comments:

Olivia: (mostly) Happy Homemaker said...

Too funny! Is Anderson Cooper really gay? I didn't know!

Sisters with Style said...

Glad I'm not the only one who thinks other people's kids are annoying--and I show it sometimes too.

Unknown said...

"Is Anderson Cooper really gay? I didn't know!"
That's okay, I'm not sure he does either!

and heck yeah, other people's kids are annoying.

Unknown said...

I am denial that Anderson Cooper is gay so yes I guess I am willing to look past that little detail. Do you have proof...real proof. I think he is married to his job and just waiting for the right (insert me) woman. thankyouverymuch.