Saturday, May 3, 2008

Mamalicious

So the other day Mr. Ashley was reading the comments and saw Mamalicious.

Mr. Ashley: I can't really see her from this small picture, but she reminds me of a girl on "Rock of Love with Bret Michaels".

Ashley: Holly? (laughing) Yeah, probably so. That's definitely a possibility. She's super hot and a little trashy, you know, she's from Oklahoma, let's her kids wear character clothes, gave them Wal-mart names, that sort of thing.

Mr. Ashley: You are so mean.

Ashley: She says it! I like her kids' names, even if she did spell one of them wrong. She's a trip. The other day she blogged about being drunk and going potty in a porta-potty and then realizing she had forgotten to take her panties off and had peed right through them. Then she just kept wearing them. She also calls her period panties her "bitch panties", that's what they call those little doggie diapers that dogs wear when in heat. She's too much, I love her.

Mr. Ashley: So if I click this it will take me to her blog? Oh wow, she is really pretty.

Ashley: Yes, isn't she cute?

Mr. Ashley: Yeah, really pretty.

(10 minutes later)

Ashley: What are you over there laughing at?

Mr. Ashley: Her entry about the panties. That's too funny.

Ashley: Oh, you are reading her blog? Hmm. Yep, she's funny.

(10 minutes later)

Ashley: Now what are you laughing at?

Mr. Ashley: That time when she said she was asked if she was pregnant three times that day. She is so funny, you are right, she's a trip.

Ashley: Oh, I hadn't read that far. I must have missed that. You're reading an awful lot of her blog.

Mr. Ashley: She is really funny.

Ashley: Yeah, people say the same thing about me.

So Mr. Ashley loves Holly. I'd invite her to come be our wife, but frankly, I'm pretty sure she also sucks at cooking and cleaning. She does have a career though, and daughters. She could maybe even bring one of them. Her paycheck would clearly have to cover a housekeeper. Also, she'd have to share her stash of prescription pills. And not be funnier than me, ever.

I'm sure the novelty would wear off REAL QUICK for Mr. Ashley. Two internet addicted, housekeeping failures, who were loud mouthed class clowns? Oh yeah, that would be fun for everyone.

It probably would be pretty fun for me and Holly though, and really, our happiness is what matters.

Mr. Ashley is also full of questions for the commenter who showed us her boobies. That was fun. I'd link to her naughty blog here, but she said she accidentally forgot to log off of that account, so maybe she doesn't want the extra publicity. Not that what she wants will deter the curious, who will just go to the vitamin post and look for boobies, but I'll make you all work for it.

Lots of questions there: Do you know her? Do you read her blog? Who does she write it for? Did you read that one part...? (Then I would remind him that I had not yet gotten around to checking out the blog, and that although I like boobies, they generally don't make me stop in my tracks, drop everything and follow them to the end of the internetz right there and then) Were those really her boobies? I like her.

So, a few of you are catching Mr. Ashley's attention. With your hawtness and your boobies and whatnot. Just thought I'd let you know in case your own husbands were ignoring you, or not reading your blog, or telling you that you were pretty or funny often enough.

Ahem.

18 comments:

morewineplease said...

I almost fell off my seat, this is the funniest post.. I love & adore Mamalicious... the two of you would make quiet a pair! You ladies are a part of my daily reading escape!
I love your blog!

Doré said...

This is hilarious!! I haven't read Mamalicious, but I'll be heading over there soon. Don't worry Ashley... You're still my favorite! lol

AFRo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
jennyandcompany said...

Hauley is a trip, i have stalked her on bbc at times cuz she's such a cutie.

btw, is there some secret place where all the good stuff is on nbbc? i'm one of the losers that just got an invite cuz i was resisting for a while, and now i need some good internetz again.

Denise said...

This was a great post! I'm heading off to read Mamalicious now!

Sasha said...

Oh yes, I've loved Holly since she showed up in first grade in a Hawaiian shirt with a comb in her back pocket. I knew that we'd be instant (and forever) friends. She does indeed rock and is indeed hawt and hey, who of us is not a little bit trashy?

adamandkaylasmommy said...

I cannot make it thru my days without Ashley and Mamalicious. I have also used the term multislaking in my daily vocabulary.

Hilary said...

Ashley, I have got to say that you are absolutely HILARIOUS!!! my great friend Dore` introduced me to your page and I am so glad that she did. You have inspired us both to become bloggers, though we are incredibly dull in comparison to you. I look forward to reading more about your life....and comparing it to mine...whereas I have two little girls that are 11 months apart.

AFRo said...

I had a moment. Whatever. You had to know I'd be back in the name of world peace.

Ashley said...

lol, afro did you delete your comment? What was it? I didn't know you could delete comments.

Hi Hilary! It's great to have you and Dore here. Have fun blogging.

Sash, I'm so jealous you and Haulley are IRLBFF. She has "real life" friend potential, for sure.

Lipstick said...

Ashley...you, Sasha, and Mamalicious are all daily reads for me! You all make me lol and have also inspired me to start a blog. Thanks for all your fabulous posts!

Shannie said...

I loved the pee panties entry. That cracked my ass up. And she has some hI-larious terms... You used the perfect example, "bitch panties." She's on my blogroll.

AFRo said...

One can delete their own comments. That is possible. It's gone now, so we're going to move on. K?thxbai.

Madden said...

Ok, fine. I'll post my boobies.

Madden said...

Oh man it is going to drive me absolutely nuts wondering what afro deleted, because I love and respect her.

It had to be bad.

Mamalicious said...

Hello, Ashleys... I posted a reply to this here proposal for being your sister-wife. It will work for me, and I do actually clean. I love cleaning. I just don't cook.

Ashley, you will always be funnier than me and that will never stop. As long as you don't try to out-tan me, then we'll do just fine.

Mr. Ashley- Maybe you and Daddylicious can have your own bro-mance and take some mancations. You may eventually want him to be your brother-husband.

I love My Ashley,
Your Future Sister-Wife

AFRo said...

I was having a moment on the amount of time my husband spends with other *cough* bloggers *cough* and did a little name calling and whatnot. It had to go... or you wouldn't respect me anymore.

Kate said...

Wait, what have I been missing? I must go check out Mamalicious because:

1. She and Sasha are real life friends and I might be a bit hot for Sasha

2. Ashley thinks she's funny

3. Mr Ashley thinks she's hot

4. She talks about drinking and peeing - two of my favorite things!

I must warn you, I'm not going to be happy if she's inappropriate as that is MY job! :P