Saturday, July 26, 2008

Parenting 101: Jedi Mind Tricks

Big Kid is standing here in my face, sucking his lip against his teeth so it makes a horrid squealing, farty kind of sound.

I am locked in a silent stare down while he does this. I'm not even looking at the computer as I type this.

Two minutes ago I specifically, flat out told him that he was making me insane. To please just go entertain himself while his brother naps and not to ask me for anything else for at least an hour.

And now he is standing there, making that sucking sound, challenging me to send him to his room which would result in him screaming and crying and me telling him time out doesn't start until he's quiet and him completely not grasping that concept and it turning into a 35 minute ordeal over the stupid sucking sound.

I just turned my lock down stare into the Evil Eye and he cut it out right quick. I need to start learning Jedi mind tricks to control these brats for the sake of my sanity, and for the sake of the universe really. As I figure them out, I will pass this knowledge along to you.

So far the silent stare down/intensifying evil eye tactic has been successful. I doubt it will last for long, but even if it just gets me a couple of hours today, I'll consider it a win.

8 comments:

Mom Taxi Julie said...

LOL. I just made my son pick up his ream of paper he had all over the floor. He has a thing for paper, scissors, glue and drawing. After asking him nicely so many times I gave him a time limit and told him he was going to sit on his bed if he didn't get it done. He actually did. I can't believe it!

Anonymous said...

Aaaaw Ashley..

me thinks you need a drinky(or 10):( Can your visitors come earlier than proposed night out?

the offer still stands of taking BK and lk off your hands....but the shipping may cost more than daycare, and definitely more than a girly night out.

Zoe,
middle of nowhere, Ireland

txchic said...

OMG! You get a couple of HOURS out of a stare? I need to be trained by you. Most days I'm praying for just 5 minutes!! Way to go!!!

Kaza said...

I've gotta try that one next time. Though my 3yo is so sensitive it would just dissolve her into tears anyway. Perhaps she's not quite ready for the Jedi Evil Eye.

Life, Love & Lola said...

DARTH ASHLEY!

Joy said...

Ok as soon as you figure it out you Must share it with all of us!

Hubs is gone tonight and I have been stuck alone with them since like 2! WTF I am due a night out.

Rebecca said...

Sometimes, I add the 'evil head whip' to the beginning of the stare to increase the effectiveness. If they don't catch the head whip the first time, you can do it again.

Although....if you know they are looking at you...sometimes the slow turn and stare works better. Scarier...like that little girl from the Exorcist.

Ashley said...

LMAO...I like that, Rebecca. I like it a lot.

Zoe, I'm coming to visit one day.