Monday, March 10, 2008

Deadbeat Parenting

Is it wrong to keep your kid home from school because he doesn't have any clean underwear?

Yeah. I thought so.

I forgot to tell you all what happened last week. It totally took me down as the coolest mom in the class AND I think the teacher knows that we are deadbeats.

Wednesday was our day to bring the T snack. And we forgot.

Almost even worse, the teacher had already brought T stuff in, and told Mr. Ashley that she knew our schedule was off.

I'm guessing she has figured out that we have no schedule.

Ugh.

So instead she said we could have U for snack. U? Gee, thanks. U sucks for snack. The only thing I can think of is Umbrella shaped cookies and I have the cookie cutter, but it seems like a lot of work.

Can I say once again for the fortune that I'm paying them, they should provide the freakin' snack?

Also, they're still running the pizza and cookie scam, where for the mere price of $7 per meal, my child can have a piece of pizza and a Chips Ahoy cookie.

$7! I could buy a whole pizza for that. And Chips Ahoy cookies? For $7 you can't splurge on some bakery cookies?

So Mr. Ashley and I don't sign up for it, because frankly, the tuition is choking us and we just can't afford a $7 lunch on top of it.

Big Kid hasn't cared all year, but a few days ago he said he was the only kid that brings his lunch on Fridays. He said sometimes his teacher gives him a piece of pizza or a cookie, but it still annoys me that there is even an opportunity to make my kid feel like the outcast because mommy doesn't want to fork over the cash for overpriced pizza and cookies.

Anyway, we woke up late this morning and it was cold and I couldn't find clean undies for Big Kid so I asked if he wanted to stay home.

He said no.

So I told him if he stayed home, I'd take him to the library, make him hot chocolate for breakfast, and we could watch 101 Dalmations. He tried to negotiate some library time after school, but I said no deal.

So he's home and it looks like I'll be paying the library the money I owe them. Damn.

Note to self: do laundry.

35 comments:

Madden said...

What bothers me is the total CRAP they feed the kids. The lunches are bad enough (deep fried french toast sticks? omg). Then they throw in snacks every damn day on top of it. I want to tell them that I don't really want my kid to eat a donut or cookie or cake or candy every single day, but I don't want to be a total bitch either. I hate it. And ALL the teachers are cows, how do you reason with that?

Madden said...

It is bad parenting to teach your kid that going commando feels cool?

Joy said...

I was a deadbeat the other day when I forgot The Kindergartners snack, we send their own everyday. I got scolded by him when he got in the car "MOM why didn't I have a snack in my bag today?" it was the first time so hopefully his teacher doesn't think I am a total looser.

BTW $7 for pizza and a cookie wtf has this world come to? That is just crazy. Of course I feel like his public school is constatly milking us for money for some sort of project, field trip or something or other.

The Nester said...

$7 for pizza and a cookie! I thought the $3.50 we had to pay at my boys old private school was huge!

U could be for underwear. Then they would really love you.

jenn in Maine said...

What about "ugly" something for the U-snack? I'm picturing cupcakes with gray icing and two kinds of mismatched sprinkles. Four year olds think that kind of thing is a riot.

caitlin said...

you just KNOW he'd totally blab about the no underwear thing...no matter how cool it feels ;)

and F the school...just buy him a pack of cookies, and send him to school with a pizza lunch-able :P

Melissa said...

$7 for pizza and a cookie is ridiculous. I wouldn't pay for that either.

Schools ALWAYS ask for money. It's insane how much they expect parents to do! I know because I work in one lol.

Renee said...

That is highway robbery - do they at least call it a Fund Raiser? Because of course they're making a profit off of this. At W's preschool, they do advertise Pizza Day as a school fundraiser (again, don't we pay enough that they don't need weekly fundraisers?) but we are lucky because W does half days and leaves before lunch. I send a snack with him but there is no pressure to buy anything at school. Much better this way.

-The Renee

Madden said...

I say let him fly his freak flag :)

Renee said...

OT: I just noticed that there have been 40 posts on here in March. 40. And today is the 10th. No wonder I'm having trouble keeping up! I had a kick-ass productive week last week, plus company this weekend (MIL), and now I feel like I have to take a day to get caught up on what's going on with you. I'm not telling you to slow down or anything. Just pointing out the insanity. (Keep 'em coming though!)

-The Renee

slacker mama said...

Our school (my euphemism for daycare) does include the pizza for lunch on Friday as part of the tuition, but we have to provide "healthy sides" on that day. We also have to provide lunch the other 4 days of the week. I think it's a total scam.

I also think it sucks since how often on a Friday do you just want to call and order a pizza for dinner...which we can't do since the girls have already eaten it once that day.

But enough about me...I think umbrella cookies could help you quickly regain your cool mom status. Maybe you can just buy the tube of sugar dough and decorate them with sprinkles to make them not labor intensive?

Sally said...

Ugli Fruit
http://www.ugli.com/about_us.html

A local pizza place sells Ugly sticks. Twisty bread sticks served w/ pizza sauce.

Udon Noodles

Utz Brand chips

Upside down cake or upside down cupcakes.

Hair Girl said...

The best thing that happened to me was "Kindergarten Kommunity Snack" Ridiculous, right?
It works like this-you send in a snack for the whole class during a specific week. The teachers keep it in the KKS Pantry and decide what they are serving that day. If you forget on Monday, no big deal, send it in when you get a chance. No theme or specifics other than the dietary restrictions. (peanuts and strawberries this year)

mrs said...

Apparently there's a thing called Ugli Fruit.

http://www.tropiquality.com/pages/ugli.html

lisa said...

we had to pay $2 for a field trip to the GROCERY STORE(that was worth pushing the shift key button)! wtf??!! out of the $500 a month i pay you can't cover the 2 bucks? i so wanted to keep ds home that day. ugh!

only 2 more payments then it's of to kinder where i'll get mauled for my cash x2. yippie.

Mom of 5 said...

Why not do something "upside down" for U? Upside down cupcakes. (frost the bottom?) Upside down something? Hmmm.

How about "U" shaped sugar cookies. Saves the hassle of an umbrella cookie cutter. Just roll them out like snakes then put them in a "u" shape.

Do you have any cocktail umbrellas? You could use anything, stick an umbrella on top and call it "Under the Umbrella" snack.

Edible underwear? No? Probably not appropriate. But you'd probably get a discount from Too Timid. ;)

And 7.00??? That's freaking highway robbery!!! I could see 3.00MAX and even THAT is pushing it for one slice and a cookie or two (and not even bakery!). That reminds me of how the kids' elementary school charges 2.00 for a dixie cup of Jamba Juice. IN freaking SANE. And of course the kids want it!!!!

I LOVE Mommy Guilt. NOT.

so tired said...

Just buy more underwear with the $7 you are saving on the pizza and cookie scam.

Oh and I saw that Renee wrote about the 40 posts. Slow down already. I'm a very busy person. I have several other blogs to read and comment on. I can't spend all day every day reading your posts. Take a break one or two posts a day should suffice. We'll still read you every day.

Also, are you taking any special medication to get you this motivated, with all the house cleaning and posting? If so, I need some too. Don't be selfish. Tell us what it is.

Anonymous said...

LMFAO, we've done the "you have no clean undies, so you can't go to school" thing. hahaha! Kinda brought a tear to my eye.

You could totally reclaim the coolest parent status with the umbrella cookies. Go For It!

~Tara

Anonymous said...

Upside down cupcakes! SO easy. Buy them at the store, take off the liners, put them upside down. Done.

elaines630 said...

I must say I have been a lurker for awhile now - but I am commenting now!! I love your blog - you keep me entertained! And now I am tagging you :)

http://catsnhooks.blogspot.com/2008/03/my-first-tag.html

Tracy said...

For the record... your school lunch program is a total racket... we were getting pizza, chocolate milk and bakery cookie for $4.50!
Ohhhh... if only we were neighbors. We'd make you feel better in the deadbeat department. We had to resort to homeschooling because as such an unstructured bunch, and as two WAH parents, we were perpetually unable to conform to the demands of traditional education/real life. OK, there were other real issues too, but we were getting a little too used to the patronizing looks of teachers and administrators everytime kids/we were late/forgot/absent/etc... OMG, I'm about to issue myself a patronizing look... Anyways.
Been there.
I take great comfort in hearing of another parent's otherwise harmless deadbeat-ness.

Madden said...

Don't slow down! Keep going fast. That's how I like it.

Joy said...

Don't you dare slow down on your posts I love it. Even though my hubs thinks I am insane and kinda stalkerish for checking in mulitiple times a day. Seriously what else am I suppose to do every day? clean my house, whatever.

NY Bitch said...

Make/get/use a regular snack and put it UNDER something. Now you have a snack AND an activity (heh) and you will be back on the Coolest Mom Pedestal.

OR have them eat one of the U foods mentioned above UNDER an UMBRELLA. In their UNDERWEAR. Hmm. That's a tad ironic.

Anonymous said...

Wow. I have a home daycare and we have pizza for lunch every Friday...and I don't charge extra for it! Clearly, I'm missing out on a big money making scheme...er, idea.

I have been known to stop at Walgreens or Rite Aid on the way to school and BUY underwear for the kids...nothing like teaching kids how to change in the car without exposing themselves! I'm sure that trick will bite me in the butt one day :^/

queenstella said...

Go multicultural -- "Uvas" means "Grapes" in Spanish.

Stand firm. The pizza deal is a rip-off!

I feel you on the underwear.

Dingo said...

I love your posts! They get me through the day.

I can only imagine what Big Kid's teacher would've thought if he'd let slip (or proudly announced) that he was going commando. Forgetting the T snack would've been a distant memory.

Anonymous said...

I am totally with all of you on the whole junk food at school thing! We do not feed my kid junk food (I'm kinda mean like that) but as a result he LOVES fruits and veggies. Oh wait, I have to ETA that I forgot to go to the grocery store last night and all my little one had for breakfast were gerber fruit chews....but that's still fruit, right? :)fruit chews and milk. I'm a great mom.

Jeni said...

My kids private school does the same thing on Fridays, plus we pay extra for our dd to have pineapple pizza, she's a diva I know, and most of the time she still ends up with cheese! WTF! I'm paying a fortune for this and they can't even get it right. It's not like she goes to some huge school. My wallet feels your wallets pain.

coffee&chocolate said...

It is unreal how often you sound exactly like me. I can't get over it.

I like the upside down food.

Cake said...

The umbrella cookies would be cute, but a PITA. I've bribed my DS to stay home several times, but never for underwear, only because he has a ton. :)

Madden said...

I don't like how teachers think they can over-ride your decision to not feed your kid pizza and a cookie. Maybe you don't want him to eat that crap? It kills me how they think they are superior.

Madden said...

Can you tell there were a few things about this post that bugged me? :)

Anonymous said...

Wow $7 for pizza and a cookie!!! We do the private school too and we get 2 slices, milk, and ice cream for $3!! There making some serious money off those suckers that buy it!!

FYI, warn BK not to tell the teacher why he missed school today! My kids always tell the most interesting details of our life. Like today when my BK's teacher was loading him in the car and she commented on his science project and he just blurted out, "oh my dad did most of it!!" Shoulda seen her face! Lovely.

Good luck with the letter U snack.
Trisha

Dre the Texican said...

I am on the ugly bandwaggon here. And my vote still counts, right? Thanks.