Monday, February 25, 2008

I Quit

I used to think that babies and children that drank cleaning supplies and ate pennies were obviously a little...well...off.

Isn't it basic human instinct not to drink stuff that tastes like poison? Isn't it more difficult than it is worth to try to swallow a metal disc?

Then I had little kid.

With little kid these sort of tasks are not exploration gone wrong by a little adventurer....they are hourly fucking occurrences.

He looks at those safety latches that stop me from getting into my own cabinets every time I try, as a mere suggestion, and not one worth following.

Everything that could possibly be choked on...goes straight in the mouth.

I was up at 7am (yes 7 A.M., as in morning time) with the little punks because Mr. Ashley was up last night puking.

I don't know, I don't want to come right out and say it, but I think he made himself barf to get out of dealing with these kids for one more day.

So I spent a feverish, sweat soaked, sleepless, ice cream free night...I am still EXHAUSTED, unable to eat, light headed, dizzy, queasy and only able to imbibe the smallest, most watered down sips of anything...and I've been up since 7 in the morning, wiping asses, fishing dimes from people's mouths and eyeballing the contents of various cleaning solutions to try to get a good guesstimate on whether or not enough has been ingested to call Poison Control.

It is so, so utterly unfair that I want to scream, but that would only worsen my headache.

19 comments:

Catfish said...

Oh MY Goodness! Your weekend pretty much sounds like hell on earth and I'm so sorry you are still going through it. YUCK

Anonymous said...

Bless your heart. If I lived close, I'd buy your ice cream for you and throw it at your door. Drink the Lactinex granuals...all of you... it will help! Prayers for better days. ;)

clemsonlocal said...

Hang in there! This is the not-so-fun part of motherhood!

jenn in Maine said...

It is absolutely NOT FAIR for husbands to get sick before we are 100% better. They just slink off to some dark corner and sleep through the illness while we have to drag ourselves up and be Mommy again. Mr. Ashley obviously did not receive the memo.

Joy said...

All I know is when I am sick I am still taking care of all the BS around here feeding the kids taking him to school and what not, hubs gets the least bit feverish and he is in bed for hrs. WTF? men are such babies.

I was worried something had happened to you, with the whole no posts and all. Hope your feeling better. The kindergartener is home again! this sucks

Princess Peaches~n~Cream said...

OMG, he DIDN'T go get the ice cream? Screw him being sick, he needs to get his ass out of bed as punishment. Jerk.

DF tried this with me on Friday. After 5 minutes of silence, he went and bought it. My throat is so raw, it's the only thing I can eat. :-(

Hair Girl said...

Feel better soon!
This is when you need to lock LK on the lanai.

hicktowndiva said...

Oh, no! You poor thing! Feel better soon, Ashley.

Joy said...

OK.. I must say that I feel guilty that I find humor in your sickness!! But as an ER Nurse & mom... I think I have seen all of these (actually in the past 3 weeks) luckily we (the family) have escaped so far! Hang in there & try your best to get as much liquids in as possible (ice Cream is soo included in that list!)

Really love your blog, you have certainly landed on my daily read list!)

Hope all you guys feel better soon!

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear you are so sick. I've been sick for over a month now and the hubs has been out of town for 2 weeks. Fun Fun!!
Hang in there Ash!

~Tara

Anonymous said...

Maybe you should keep the poison out of reach? I don't know, just a suggestion.

Cate said...

ugh, my comeent was so good and it was lost %$#@@#$%!!!!!!!!! any way iat had good suggestions about velcro and duct tape for little kid and a little pst for Mr Ashley and emergency need for poison....sorry too tired get well soon.

Cake said...

:( I hope this shit storm lifts soon!

Traci said...

I can totally relate.. the whole fam had a bug just like that 2 weekends ago. It.was.the.worst.

I hope you feel better soon.
It's no fun being the Mommy and being sick.
Sometimes, it's no fun being the Mommy.Period but it sucks alot more when you're sick.

I sent you an e-mail... don't you ever check it? Or are you ignoring me?

Anonymous said...

I hope you blog more soon, I have seriously come to love reading your blog!

mrs said...

I just crossed my fingers hoping there'd be a new post (hoping you were better but mostly to fulfill my need for your witty self). Damn.

Rebecca said...

Hoping to hear an update from your soon....a good one!

Anonymous said...

I hope you are all feeling better today.

Snooty Primadona said...

Just found your blog & LOVE IT! Finally, I find someone else that cusses almost as much as I do, lol. I just happen to look like a lady, then you get to know me & discover that I LOVE to cuss & swear worse than the average sailor.

Anyway, I added you to my blogroll so I can read every word you write. ;P