Sunday, February 24, 2008
(and now I'm switching to Mr. Ashley's computer because do I really need to be reminded of my lack of a goddamn space bar after every freaking word? No. No, I do not.)
My method results in tears, drama, praying, and cursing like a sailor.
little kid thinks if you run fast enough, you might just get away.
This is, in my experience, THE LEAST effective way of dealing with vomiting. Not only does it not work AT ALL, but you widen the path of destruction in a major way.
So yeah. Fun weekend around here. Mr. Ashley wins #1 Human Being of the Week award, which is pretty impressive since he wasn't even in the top 50 as of Friday. God bless that man and all of the puke sodden sheets, towels and clothing that he has washed.
I was so, so, so sick. I woke up at one point cradling a bucket of bile in bed beside me. Around 4am I remember falling asleep between heaves and wearily deciding that I was just going to roll over on to my tummy and go to sleep and we could always just get a new mattress if I puke on this one.
The next lucid thought I had was around 4:30pm, when Mr. Ashley gingerly peeled the acrid, sweat soaked down comforter off of my head and asked if I was alive. I was surprised to find that I was and even more surprised to find myself soaking wet, covered in hot wetness and lying in a puddle of sweat. I requested a new top blanket, rolled to a dry corner and lied there exhausted, watching the true crime network as I drifted in and out of consciousness.
A few hours later I ventured out to find a gray but recovering Big Kid, a puking while running little kid and a very tired Mr. Ashley. I still feel like crap and I cannot eat and can barely drink but I am just so so so glad not to be hanging over a toilet in some fashion, that anything feels good at this point.
Also, can I admit that while lying on my cold, filthy bathroom floor (which was ironically to be the big and much needed focus of Suds it Up Saturday) that I was making up LOL catz for you all? My crazy ass wanted to get up, with my shivering and sweating and puking and pooping, and post a LOL cat for you all. THAT IS DEDICATION.
If you haven't taken the time to vote for me for the awards in my sidebar after hearing that, you have No Heart. No Heart At All.