Monday, February 18, 2008

You get an X, Not a Check

Let's talk behavior for a moment here, people.

1. Every kid has a bad day. Sometimes both of them even end up having the same bad day. Let's say this day happens to fall on the same day you're getting professional portraits taken of them. Every parent's nightmare right? Yeah, but it happens. Kids have bad days.

However....

Let's say the photographer totally rocks and feels for you, even though there were more than enough decent shots to choose from. Let's say the photographer offers to re-shoot, just for fun (eh, fun, heh heh). Awesome, right?

Right.

At this point though, your kids better not have another bad day. For both kids to be having the same bad day again...I don't know. It might be a good indicator that it happens more than you realize.

Also, if your kids start having a bad day again and the photographer has already utilized every trick she knows and is looking at you expectantly, it might be time to start pinching people and hissing threats. The photographer will not only pretend not to notice, she'll respect you for it.

I think it's also a given that you should NOT, I repeat, should NOT bring your own camera and photograph alongside the photographer.

And after you have spent an hour with someone in the early morning sun listening to your kids whine and watching as they hit each other with props...it wouldn't be cool to have forgotten your checkbook. Not cool at all, as a matter of fact.

Moving right along...

2. Let's talk about clearance aisles.

Let's say we encounter each other in the Valentine's clearance section at Target. Do NOT, let me repeat, do NOT let me sense you getting aggressive with me. Just calm down, don't make any attempts to block me or my view, be respectful with your cart and maintain normal personal space barriers.

If I feel that you're about to freak out or that you are blatantly disregarding these rules, I will probably take every item that I suspect you may be interested in, load them up in my cart and take them on a ride around the store.

I know 75% off is an awesome deal, but there's no reason to act like a fucking psycho.

21 comments:

Trenches of Mommyhood said...

So what do people do with 75% Valentines clearance items? Do they just go ahead and eat the box o' chocolates for dessert?

I always see those great deals, but am like, "Ehhh...what could I do with them?" Unless I could save them for next year, that is.

Hair Girl said...

You should have taken LK along to bite them!

jennyandcompany said...

what to do with chocolate? someone dared to ask? you hide it from the kids and indulge while reading online drama, duh. i did get some red tissue paper for cheap - you can end up with every color of the rainbow after every holiday.

she seriously got out her camera and took her own pictures!!!! that's pretty freaking unbelievable - i highly doubt it was to scrapbook the memorable event of getting portraits made. i'm cheap, but that's just downright wrong.

the driftwood collector said...

I cannot believe that she took photos with her own camera. Unbelievable. And yeah, no psychos on clearance aisles, please.

Anonymous said...

Please tell me that what you just wrote was part of your "fictional" life!! If not, some people have a lot of nerve! I am not a violent person but I think I would have run her and her "behaviorally challenged" children over with my cart.

Trisha

AFRo said...

No she din't!!! I'm with hair girl, LK would've been a GREAT assistant on this trip. Brought her camera to shoot next... No ma'am. LK could've bit her too. My goodness.

FunnyGal KAT said...

Who brings a camera to a professional photo shoot?!? That's like bringing your own food to a restaurant... or something like that. Of course, this could be to your advantage because she'll see how crappy her point-and-shoot photos are next to yours. Or she could just be a cheap bee-otch (and her "forgetting" her checkbook makes me lean toward that option).

Adamandkaylasmommy said...

WOW! I cant believe that I never even thought of taking my own camera along. There is cheap and then there is disrespectfull. I would have been so pissed after putting up with all her shit only to find that she didnt have her checkbook. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

mommymo said...

Ashley, please tell me that I'm reading it wrong. Cheap photo mama is not the same as Target clearance aisle person, is she? Those were two different situations, right? Right? 'Cuz, if they're the same people, you really need to give this lady an x.

Teri said...

Ditto mommymo, they aren't one and the same right? If so, totally sic LK on her, it's justified at this point.

Who does she think she is, a pap?

Jen said...

Oh my! You make me laugh out loud!How does all this stuff happen to you?

Migraine Mom said...

Okay..I have become a daily reader so I decided to give in and post a comment because I am seriously laughing out loud! I had a similar experience in Target today..what is so wrong with leaving your cart at the end of the aisle and walking through the aisle people?? It's not that hard to do...and who said what do you do with Valentine candy?? You eat it, of course! :)

Migraine Mom said...

See, once I start commenting you can't stop me! In one of the comments above I think people are misunderstanding you....you weren't having your children photographed you were the photographer! Just wanted to clear that up for you in case people were confused...read the WHOLE blog people!

Anonymous said...

What a cheap twat. Can I say twat?

Mamalicious said...

For Shit's Sake! Someone took their own camera to your photo shoot? Tell us how you REALLY feel about that.

Holly

Mo said...

Since when is someone allowed to take their own pics at a professional shoot?? No, really- who sets up a photography appt. and then thinks to themselves, hey, this would be a great time to get some shots of my own- seriously? And then no check book- sounds fishy to me!

Tracy said...

Shooting kids is a total trip! I'd love to say I love it. It stresses me out. When its good... it's very good. When it's bad... hmmmmm....
When mum is in there snappin' away with her SureShot, it's a total pain in the ass. I've had a lot of that at weddings. So far so good at portrait shoots.
Oh, and for some reason I can't settle on an ID when I comment here. All the choices confuse me......

Charlotte said...

I hit the Valentine section at Target myself - bought stuff i didnt need but since it was on sale......Love your blog!

Joy said...

Oh my freaking god I would have stopped right there and ripped that (what I assume) is a cheap, junky camera from her and told her to take her "behaviorally challenged" kids and hit the road. The nerve and then to forget her checkbook I would have been so pissed.

I too hate to pay the price at the photographer but he does a freakin awesome job and it is so worth what I believe is an investment-non of those Sears pics in this house. Damn why can't you live closer I swear my kids would be oh so cute and I would never bring my camera.

Jamie said...

Some people are so RUDE!

~Gretchen~ said...

what a shitstain!