Let's talk behavior for a moment here, people.
1. Every kid has a bad day. Sometimes both of them even end up having the same bad day. Let's say this day happens to fall on the same day you're getting professional portraits taken of them. Every parent's nightmare right? Yeah, but it happens. Kids have bad days.
Let's say the photographer totally rocks and feels for you, even though there were more than enough decent shots to choose from. Let's say the photographer offers to re-shoot, just for fun (eh, fun, heh heh). Awesome, right?
At this point though, your kids better not have another bad day. For both kids to be having the same bad day again...I don't know. It might be a good indicator that it happens more than you realize.
Also, if your kids start having a bad day again and the photographer has already utilized every trick she knows and is looking at you expectantly, it might be time to start pinching people and hissing threats. The photographer will not only pretend not to notice, she'll respect you for it.
I think it's also a given that you should NOT, I repeat, should NOT bring your own camera and photograph alongside the photographer.
And after you have spent an hour with someone in the early morning sun listening to your kids whine and watching as they hit each other with props...it wouldn't be cool to have forgotten your checkbook. Not cool at all, as a matter of fact.
Moving right along...
2. Let's talk about clearance aisles.
Let's say we encounter each other in the Valentine's clearance section at Target. Do NOT, let me repeat, do NOT let me sense you getting aggressive with me. Just calm down, don't make any attempts to block me or my view, be respectful with your cart and maintain normal personal space barriers.
If I feel that you're about to freak out or that you are blatantly disregarding these rules, I will probably take every item that I suspect you may be interested in, load them up in my cart and take them on a ride around the store.
I know 75% off is an awesome deal, but there's no reason to act like a fucking psycho.